Max Bateman

piss poor at practically everything practical.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@BBCOne @jackwhitehall @grahnort @davidwalliams @lovegwendoline @TheRealLukevans @petercrouch @samfendermusic I’m assuming Graham is fine and he’s just in Israel for Eurovision?

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@richardosman Anything south of Birmingham is South anything North of Birmingham is North... the midlands are self explanatory.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@AyoCaesar That’s the main thing to be fair.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@KellyCates @AlexScott I really enjoy watching you both on TV Kelly and Alex & I like Gabby Logan, Claire Balding and Sue Barker on QoS and lots of female sports presenters now I think about it. The sex doesn’t matter if you’re good at what you do but sadly change in attitudes takes time.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@RealMattLucas “Yes, Hello, I’d like a prime time satirical political news programme showing absolutely zero political bias or endorsement whilst discussing the parties directly & making fun of them all in equal measure”

“One moment please...

Margaret, Margaret”

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@iainkevanmorris There’s a pre X-ray fluffer on hand if you go private!

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@jeremycorbyn Not saying Tory’s are any better both parties are so frustrating. They’d rather repeat the same shit & reinforce the ignorance of those who’s minds are already made up than actually offer people who will put our votes where makes sense anything tangible to base those decisions on

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@jeremycorbyn So what are those solutions Jez? it was Labour’s piss poor economic policies, ignoring all warnings, that has resulted in ‘generation rent’ and contributed to the financial crash. We need business stimulation to generate jobs & income to sustain wonderful things like the NHS...

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@SkySportsNews do you know how irritating it is on your app watching a 30 second advert for something I’m never going to buy before a 40 second clip of someone’s post match interview. if it’s a full 5-10 min interview, fine. For a tiny clip it pisses everyone off, please stop.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@discokidnap @Baddiel Love this!

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@qikipedia But It’s the only costume I can fit in... those damn sexy penguins.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@MTLawrenson @Kjt5Toole You look exactly like Sam did when he was younger!

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@DavidJonesSky @KellyCates Excellent! 😂

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@Maisie_Williams Arya Starkers.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@redbethmond Awful. What benefits was he refused?

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@primevideouk Di caprio 2010-2019
No question.

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@PhilNWang @richardosman That’s very funny Phil Wang

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@mrdanwalker Shangfly

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

@JeremyClarkson @Marvlotte By far the worst offenders!

[Max Bateman @MaxwellBateman5]

Really not sure why but I cried slightly when I found out #OliviaColman had won. She’s just excellent, in everything!