Maya Qazilbash

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

Chat I was casually dating this man from hinge and in the span of the last week I realized we didn’t have romantic energy and now I’m coaching him through getting back with his ex I can’t decide if this is in character or not

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

The darkness has returned but at least so have the homemade memes

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

I’ve quoted this so many times since seeing it yesterday that I had to find it again so I could officially make it part of my digital footprint

[doomer @uncledoomer]

a snow hurricane is about to wipe boston off the face of the planet and youre laughing?

[ѕєиɪ @zalatwicc]

for halloween i will be okay

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

I can’t get over the part of “Rainbow Connection” where Kermit’s voice gets all echoey and he croaks “have you heard voices”

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@allcob_nocorn @secondjenna Infinite money hack

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

(Sawyer soft launch)

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

Long distance date idea: you take apart a Russian nesting doll over FaceTime and I react like you’re killing them the whole time

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

Tasha and I studying for an polysci final: you think Obama understands this?

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@fully_delulu *panting and wheezing* I’m trying

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@allcob_nocorn On it

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

It’s 2025: all public bathroom locks should have the vacant/occupied labels

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@prespaxson69 She was actually a god to me

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

I just changed into an old t-shirt to eat my meatball sub because I knew I would get sauce on my outfit. I have never felt so much like an adult and yet so much like a child

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

Family dinner conversation topic tonight: What circumstances would have to occur for you to become a political assassin?

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

*Listening to “you’re a mean one Mr. Grinch”*
Calvin: imagine being the grinch and this diss track drops. Devastating.

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

Splashing cold water on your face does what SSRIs could never

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@dhruvamjr Google sues

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@tylerrose071 Have never agreed more

[Maya Qazilbash @MayaQazilbash]

@alexbutcher04 This one hurts.