Megan Salvin

A dessert without chocolate is a waste of my time and calories

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

Somewhere a girl just woke up next to a guy she met dt meanwhile I woke up to half eaten KwikTrip chicken tenders LITERALLY STILL IN MY HAND

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@DanteTheDon @DannyJConrad “Uncle teaches nephew about life” but life = conspiracy theories and the nephew desperately trying to bring his uncle back to the real world (it never works)

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@NoahKahan so i guess you ~don’t~ wanna go to Maine 🥺

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@KevinRyanComedy absolutely zero life behind those eyes

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@kellykeegs THANK you finally someone understands

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@KFCradio @FeitsBarstool @KFCBarstool If you’re a regular listener, you absolutely would.

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@MeWeFree_ @HFoleyComedy @KevinRyanComedy @AreYouGarbage

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@FeitsBarstool you’re totally right side note how many times have you had food poisoning again?

[Gowans @tootsdeville]

All of Jake Gyllenhaal's friends tomorrow hearing 10 whole minutes of All Too Well

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@AreYouGarbage @HFoleyOnIce @KevinRyanComedy can’t decide what part of this video is more garbage - mismatched diy tupperware or leftover steak “salad”. Just perfection.

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@HFoleyOnIce From this tweet not only did I find out my dad used to have a water bed, but that he emptied it out the third floor window of his apartment building. You think you know a guy.

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@PhilProft ugh I wish

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@UncleChaps @FeitsBarstool support for the new podcast is looking good

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@FeitsBarstool @ColeyMick This genuinely hurt my feelings.

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@MattGrasso5

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

So when all of these Proud Boys are on their drive home, which restaurant do you think they’re stopping at and why is it Applebee’s?

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@holy_schnitt My dad uses a flight app and will track my flight to the point where HE will text ME “you just landed” as if I didn’t know. Bless his heart.

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@logan_lasack U r welcome 💕

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing people that all red Christmas lights are a good idea i said what i said

[Megan Salvin @MegSalvin]

@freddyhoule heck YEAH you did 🥖

[Matt Kiebus @mjkiebus]

I’ve reached the age when I drive past a house with a nice porch I literally have to say, “that’s a nice porch”