Meghann Porter

Just a small town girl. No, seriously.

[Irreverent Reverend ✊🏼🙏🏼 @TheAmberPicota]

My therapist had me write letters to people for closure, saying what I felt. They were quite explicit. When I showed up to my next appt w/ copies of them I realized she never intended for me to send them. Ma’am I’ve never been passive aggressive; just aggressive aggressive.

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

Really guys? We only rate dogs. This is a Fluffy Flower Mouse. One of the largest we’ve ever seen. Please send in dogs only. Thank you… 13/10

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

THE HUMAN JUST GRABBED THEIR KEYS. AND MY LEASH. THEY ARE PUTTING ON. THEIR OUTSIDE FEET. I DO BELIEVE. IT IS ADVENTURE TIME

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

there is a rumor going around. that i am “desperate for cuddles.” and i wanted to come forward and say. it’s true. i am

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

please adjust the spooky dial. turn it all the way up. it is time

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

i made a list of events. i think should be added. to the olympics

2. the 100m hardwood floor slide
9. least time between naps
3. walking on the opposite side of a tree. so your human has to switch the hand they are holding the leash with
6. floor routine. but it’s belly rubs

[Meghann Porter @Meghann27]

I just love this little gremlin so much I could cry ❤️❤️❤️

[Meghann Porter @Meghann27]

I just miss my mom so damn much.

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

Today I learned that corgi butts can float. Not sure what to do with this info, other than share it with you. 14/10 what a good buoy

[ᴘᴀᴠʟᴏᴠ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏʀɢɪ @PAVGOD]

girls only want one thing and it’s to pet your dog

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Hunter. He’s here to remind you that if you’re feeling stressed you can always stop what you’re doing and take a nap on the floor. 12/10 a true leader

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

every single night. i try to convince the human. they forgot to give me my dinner. and sometimes. they get so confused. they start to believe me

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

i am being told. we lost an hour of sleep last night. why. what is the point. my stuffed fren sebastian and i. will be sleeping an extra hour. every day. for the rest of the year. to make up for it

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

just a heads up. i will be running around the house. as fast as possible. for the next 15 seconds. i will have no regard for furniture. or any individuals in my way. when i am done. do not ask me why i have done this. because i do not know

[Meghann Porter @Meghann27]

Hahahaha, jokes on me, I teach special ed now and I love it

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

here is what. i plan to accomplish today:

2. bark loudly. but at nothing
7. lose my ball under the couch
7b. politely ask the human. to get my ball
3. immediately lose it again. under the same couch
4. big nap. you have worked hard
2. repeat

[Meghann Porter @Meghann27]

@sarahdactylxo I mean, if you weren’t across the country

[James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn]

Me: Do you smell that?

6-year-old: What?

Me: Love is in the air.

6: *covers her nose*

[lola 🧌 @bolaluncher]

Every year on NYE I think “no way they can turn this number into glasses” and every year I am wrong