giovanni

new york’s hottest club is my apartment

[giovanni @MichaelJarred]

heads up for my followers: if you’re uncomfortable with nudity, taylor swift, or any facet of gay twitter, please unfollow me. it’s ridiculous to have 18 million twitters accounts when i can just use this one and one other to enjoy content and i can’t manage them all anymore lol

[Don Salmon @dijoni]

History always repeated itself in America.

[Yonan @yonann]

John Krasinski says his mom talked him out of quitting three weeks before he booked The Office, so she gets 10% of everything

"I said to my mom, 'I'm going to move to New York and be an actor'"

"She said, 'The only thing I ask is that in three years, if you haven't had a bite or a nibble, you have to pull yourself out of this, because as your mother, you can't ask me to tell my son to give up on his dreams'"

"Two and a half years later, I called her and said, 'I did it. I gave it a shot, and I haven't had any nibbles.' She said, 'It's September. Let's talk about it at Christmas. Just finish the year.' Three weeks later, I booked The Office, so I owe my mom 10% of everything"

[boto @TsarinaBomba]

I’ve boarded flights on percents you wouldn’t go to the bathroom with

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

top 5 horror movies:

1. having a job.
2. not having a job.
3. applying for jobs.
4. the job market.
5. the concept of working my whole life.

[Cishet Ragatha @h8scd]

imagine having sex for the first time and fumbling so hard the photographers in their closet start cracking up

[j 💌 @sheflowerfeast]

FUCK YOU @onedirection

[ALUTHEDON @Mbakaza4L]

This ICONIC picture will get more likes than the flag of Israel.

[ivo @trashmagiq]

I want to fuck your dad. Is that what you wanted me to say? I want to have sex with your father, suck his cock and slobber on his balls.

[autist @litteralyme0]

How it GENUINELY feels watching an indie movie destroy every cash grab slop movies made by hollywood

[Jim Tang @wxmann]

They look so peaceful when they're sleeping

[Botlhale M. 💕 @Mashishi_B]

Another form of low self esteem is definitely being too available to people who have shown you countless times that they lack a sense of urgency and enthusiasm towards you. I know its hard but regulate your nervous system to calm down.

[Marina 🍀✨🫶 @mareeener]

My landlord texted me and said “hey when are you going to catch up with rent for the past few months? Just wondering”. I said “I’ve been cashapping you the rent every month, like I’ve been doing?” And he said “oh… yeah just checked it’s there. Sorry didn’t check before thanks”

[SOLAECLIPSE™️ @DrinkSolaPop]

If anything, NYC is culturally Black. Almost everything NYC is known for comes from Black ppl since the creation of hip-hop. The lingo, the clothes....most modern impersonations of someone "from NYC" is usually of a Black person.

[𝑝𝑢𝑟𝑒 @purelivn]

the earth showing off again

[🍄Oddyssey Talks ⎇⚢ @OddysseyTalks]

I really love the way she just flops his dead corpse onto the floor like garbage as soon as she gets her autonomy back. Like she could not care less about him

[shelby @thetrueshelby]

This is dystopian as fuck.

[‏ً @itsnwts]

Dating tip: if a guy tells you he’s not very political, he’s conservative but has learned that won’t get him łaid

[bONGO 🌹 @wariocolosseum]

how much of a loser do u have to be to actually donate to the government