Mike Avishai

"Screenwriter" for hire or for free... I'll take anything at this point.

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Life comes at you fast:
I used to play Edward 40 Hands with Steel Reserve and pass out in my friend’s yard; now I get overly excited for my new steam cleaner

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Life comes at you fast:
I used to do multiple Irish car bombs and pee in my friend’s closet; now I get overly excited for my new bird feeder and all the visitors.

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

A most perfect snow day
#snowday #guinness #beer #snowpocalypse #ohmyguinness

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

https://t.co/GxJHJnWRIb

New Comedy Pilot: THE WEEKEND BEGINS THURSDAY
4 college roommates. 1 sketchy house. Total chaos.
It’s Always Sunny meets Superbad — w/ a wildcard named Mad Mike and 0 adult supervision.
#ComedyPilot #TVWriting #IndieTV #TWBT #ItsAlwaysSunny #SuperbadVibes

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

@andregardner 😢

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Game face!
Vasectomy time…
👩‍⚕️+✂️=🚫🏀⚽️
#vasectomy #snipsniphooray #unprotectedsex #ouchmyballs
#kcco #billfuckingmurray #thechive #Surgeryappropriateattire

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Invite "Weird Al" Yankovic to Perform at Super Bowl LIX Half Time Show - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/lz60jpjPbQ via @Change

@NFL @AppleMusic @alyankovic
Have you signed yet??
Whatcha waiting for?

https://t.co/cQaFSGYyK3

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Invite "Weird Al" Yankovic to Perform at Super Bowl LIX Half Time Show - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/lz60jpjhmi via @Change

Let’s do this @alyankovic @NFL @NFLonFOX

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Invite "Weird Al" Yankovic to Perform at Super Bowl LIX Half Time Show - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/Q65FvsmsBU via @Change
#weirdhalftimeshow
@NFL @AppleMusic @alyankovic

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Day 1
@NFL @AppleMusic @FOXSports today starts my journey to get @alyankovic to perform at next year Super Bowl halftime show.

5 time Grammy Awards winner, 11 nominations, 4 gold records and 6 platinum records. Beloved by all.
America needs this
#WeirdHalftimeShow

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

@thedad I just spent the last 28 minutes sharpening #2 pencils with a manual pencil sharpener. Back to school season is upon us 🙌

[Mikey @MKYNXS]

HEY! @MikeAvishai! Happy birthday brother! Hope you like that I didn’t steal your bday by getting married on it. Today’s 37 for you & as my friend @BrianCOHalloran, whom I’ve been in a movie with & didn’t steal my birthday, would say
(Hope he replies cuz it’s his line)

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

@Em3hN @BrianCOHalloran @BrianCOHalloran I’m 37?!?

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Happy 4th.

May your liver take a beatin and your finger stay attached 🍻
#4thofJuly #johndeere

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

A legend has retired!
@WMGK @jdbshow

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

A perfect Saturday night #nintendo #switch #NintendoSwich #mariokart @NintendoAmerica

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

A little Saturday morning Warren Zevon
#warrenzevon #excitableboy #vinyl #music #classicrock #recordplayer #everythingsoundsbetteronvinyl

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Had a little lettuce, before cutting the grass. Now it’s done. The lettuce is still lingering, and I’m on the deck right now solo.

Fresh cut lawn smell, cold beer in hand, music playing, and the sunshine.

I’ve achieve dad bliss.

Father Nirvana, if you will…
@thedad #dadlife

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Typically Saturday evening.
@WMGK @joanjett @jackblack #schoolofrock #iloverocknroll #charliebelle #norahaley

[Mike Avishai @MikeAvishai]

Stone Temple Pilots on a classic rock station. A nice reminder that I’m getting old… great to have you back @andregardner 🤘