Military Jokes

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Rule 117: I must not use government equipment to bootleg pornography.

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Rule 102: Rats are not to be buried with full military honors, even if they are "casualties of war".

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Former Al Qaeda Executioner Finds Work as Magician: http://t.co/5gjV1tCO

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Commander Relieved for Violating Entire UCMJ: http://t.co/YP0K1sKZ

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Not allowed to chew gum unless I bring enough for everyone.

(Next Day): Not allowed to chew gum even if I *did* bring enough for everyone.

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

(To a Captain)

"You know Sir, you're really like a PFC, you've only been promoted twice."

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Navy Replaces All Sailors With Overpaid Contractors: http://t.co/ruUsxGcb

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Rule 173: I am not authorized to create new levels of security clearance.

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Marine Mascot Chesty Accidentally Euthanized: http://t.co/Ui1HSeZH

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

(Second Lt. walks by)
"EXCUSE ME, Gentlemen! Do you know how to salute? Yes, Sir. But I don't have time to teach you right now."

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

2012 Best Sick Call Competition Victor Announced: http://t.co/qQxrE29z

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Rule 99: Smiley faces are not used to mark a minefield.

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Hero Stops Car Going 8 MPH, Saves Lives: http://t.co/ZSDUQB54

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

"Gents, there's a thief in the barracks. I'm not gonna name names...but it's Miller."

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

ISAF Drops Candy to Afgan Children, Kills 51: http://t.co/WjG4EpRH

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Disney Buys Rights to Afghanistan from DoD: http://t.co/IwrXL8Fx

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Rule 81: Not allowed to wear a dress to any Army functions.

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Marine Tries to Get Revenge for Pearl Harbor: http://t.co/ysKuM4gw

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

First Sergeant Gives 72 Hour Liberty Brief: http://t.co/m8E2heaY

[Military Jokes @MilitaryJokes]

Rule 23: The Irish MPs are not after "me frosted Lucky Charms".