Velvet Milkman

I hate me too

[Maryland Sports Report @MSRterps]

Bro come on

[H @PavlovicEra_]

1946 in an alternate timeline

[Baseball’s Greatest Moments @BBGreatMoments]

That time someone tried a Reddit challenge at the absolute worst time.

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

I love how hotels will charge you $300 for smoking in your room, but you can literally jizz on anything you want, and it’s no big deal.

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

Tom Holland reacts to fans chanting “CEO!” at Jacob Batalon.

“What is this CEO thing?… CEO of sex??”

(via: @spdrsgwen)

[Evan @OhChev]

Y'all ever just play MLB The Show for like two hours and just suck complete ass the whole time?

[Kevin “K-Hole” Evan @KevinEvanonX]

I mean come on dude. #unreal

[Velvet Milkman @MilkyJohnson76]

@OmahaSteaks Thanks, maybe put instructions on it next time, Omaha

[Velvet Milkman @MilkyJohnson76]

@OmahaSteaks

[Kenjac @JackKennedy]

We're seeing this for the first time too, so we might have it wrong. But it appears that…yes…a man has spilled baked beans all over himself in a showing of ‘Cars 2’

[mhud @mhudgg]

Jamo's shorts pffftttt

[Serf @TheRoyalSerf]

"India and Pakistan are two cheeks on the same unwashed ass while Bangladesh is the taint"

[Brian Ross @brewmeone]

Australians watching their team go down 0-2 to Team USA…

[dianna @runwildkian]

Does Phillies Jose Alvarado and Knicks Jose Alvarado ever get together when they find themselves in the same city?

[Velvet Milkman @MilkyJohnson76]

Me when I see a Kiki Passo insta

[Marvel Perfect Gifs & Clips @MCUPerfectGifs]

Spider-Man: Brand New Day (2026)

[Mike Coté @ratlpolicy]

A communist claiming that something someone else earned belongs to people who didn't, in fact, earn it is almost too on the nose.

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

Zohran Mamdani's 2032 presidential campaign will be him just travelling the country remembering some guys.

He's gonna go into Iowa and be like "Who could forget the time Bob Sanders forced three fumbles against the Gophers in his last game at Kinnick?"

[Velvet Milkman @MilkyJohnson76]

LinkedIn???

[New York Basketball @NBA_NewYork]

Jalen Brunson on LinkedIn:

“Winning an NBA Championship with the New York Knicks is everything I ever dreamed of. The fans, the city, this organization...This is why I came to New York.

I'm so proud of this team. No matter the situation, we never stopped believing in each other or lost sight of our goal.

With enough work and enough belief, your dreams are possible and you can overcome any obstacle. Whatever it is in life, believe that you belong.

People might disagree but let that strengthen your belief because with hard work, preparation, and the right mindset, anything is possible.

I can't wait to celebrate with my family, my teammates, the city of New York, and everyone who's been here from day one.
We don't win this championship without you!

I also look forward to continuing to support other people's dreams through my work with the Second Round Foundation, where our mission is helping young people determine their own success no matter where they come from.

It is important to me to support the under-resourced, under-represented, and under-estimated, and to ensure that they have the tools, guidance, and belief they need to achieve their dreams.

Thank you, New York. I am forever grateful.
And always remember...The Magic is in the Work.

- JB”

[The Mossad: Satirical and Awesome @TheMossadIL]

Highest...ever?