@HanseiFirefly patience. and empathy. people who dont understand me, but try so extremely hard to mean the world to me. feeling misunderstood my whole life, being understood is the my most treasured form of love.
one of the worst things about cptsd and bpd is the constant paranoia. the constant racing thoughts when you’re having a bad day that everyone is out to get you. that no one loves you. that you’re worthless. and building that trust towards others takes years. it doesnt take days
@Favwontmiss all the time. and also that a lot of people abuse the light and unconditional love i give. they love how much i love them, but they dont love me. and dont care to.
I'm a big fan of the "GPS Theory" when you miss a turn, your GPS doesn't judge you, it recalculates. No matter how many detours you take, it finds another way forward. Life works like that too. You'll make mistakes, but your destination doesn't vanish. The route just changes.
signing myself into outpatient tomorrow.
its been two years since ive felt this depressed
but, i am so so unbelievably lucky and grateful that i know
even when my soul is being eaten away and rotting
when the darkness is starting to consume every inch of me
the sun will rise