Jessica Mascarello

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Literally my least favorite Instagram reels are doodle owners sharing " doodle grooming tips" that don't make any sense or are just plain incorrect. Watch reels from actual groomers. Please. Like don't get me wrong, def learn to groom your dog, but learn from the right people.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Look. I'm like barely into the grooming field so idk if I have a right to say this. But if you are a doodle owner, PLEASE take grooming advice from a groomer. Not from other doodle owners. It's the blind leading the blind up in this bitch.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Highlight of my day was probably someone who met me and told me I give off Aubrey Plaza vibes

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Just had to be a minor Karen and get a refund for chicken wings with what appeared to be an above normal amount of human hair in them. Lady told me it was feathers but was happy to refund. Is this a thing? Chicken wings with feathers still in them??

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

My favorite kind of weather is not paying for heat or air conditioning

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

When you're trying to eat healthy but your husband notices you mostly just eat the chocolate chips out of your trail mix anyway...so he loads it up with extra chocolate chips... That's #truelove

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

My dirty little secret is that I follow a dog grooming salon on Facebook because I can do better grooms than them and it gives me confidence.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Please don't instill fear in your kids in the name of safety i.e. don't tell them that a nonvenomous lizard in an enclosure is "poisonous" and "could bite" and they need to "be careful"

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Ok so the worst part of Netflix's #sexybeasts is that all the men have to be clean shaven to wear their masks/prosthetics 😵‍💫 #TheyLookLikeBoys #ew

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Am I the only one who feels like #temu being waaaay cheaper than Amazon gives big "someone in a third world country is earning 5 cents a day to make your cheap product" vibes? Amazon isn't much better, but it's good to be mindful about the labor that goes into a product.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Curbside pickup for Lowe's is so goddamn convenient and saves me so much time since I'd rather walk aimlessly in circles to find what I need than speak to another human being.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

I'm sad that most of the comments are saying that snakes shouldn't be pets. As someone who works with snakes professionally (and has pets) I would never EVER offer my hand to the bitey end of a snake that was behaving this way. That is a classic feeding response behavior.

[donni saphire @donni]

In exchange for 1 extra hour of sleep, you get to be sad for 5 months

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

It's definitely too early for Christmas decorations but it's definitely not too early for the anxiety of the enormous holiday gatherings, gift buying, money spending, etc.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Everyone who is pro life actually hates/shames sexually active women more than they love "the unborn"

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

My snobby ass when someone asks me what kind of doodles I have.

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

@Imak0ala Oh my God I literally haven't checked Twitter since then...just further proves how dehydrated I was 💀😅

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

Oh just your regular Saturday where it's 2pm and I just realized the only liquid I've infested is coffee

[Diana Berrent Güthe @dianaberrent]

You are eligible for the new bivalent booster *if* you:

- Completed your primary vaccine series (2 shots of Pfizer or Moderna or one shot of J&J)

- Had your last booster (if any) over 2 months ago

- Are age 12+ (for Pfizer) or age 18+ (for Moderna)

Pass it on...

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

@hockeymom0817 It's a restaurant/coffee shop and their dinner menu is the most delicious pasta I've ever had. For lunch they serve sandwiches, and their inner rail location just has the sandwiches so far. They also have beautiful Italian desserts!! Regular location is off Blair high road

[Jessica Mascarello @MissMascarello]

WD CRAVINGS IS NOW AT INNER RAIL. THIS IS NOT A DRILL