@HadrianTemple@DrewKramer@markanaki99@leatherdarkside Colin, like many subs, is a people-pleaser, who manipulates (not maliciously) to get needs met. I don’t buy “he’s a novice” idea - in the book’s 1970s context, maybe, but the bikers PDA in the bar and the internet have probably corrupted Colin a bit already before things happen.
@HadrianTemple@DrewKramer@markanaki99@leatherdarkside Eventually, it’s two unhealthy attachments colliding, one avoidant and one anxious. Many of us with those styles come to D/s to give it a framework as a solution, but when needs of intimacy arise, inevitably, we still need to face the demon and overcome it - or not, like Ray.
@fagtarnmakmorn My hot take is… “switch doesn’t exist”. All the switches I have known or “surveyed” have one thing in common - there’s always a “home base” they are more comfortable or effortless to be in, either Dom or sub. They can just travel far to the other side and have a broad range.