Mitten Squad

I'm on the YouTube. This is where the real game begins.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

I posted another update on my channel. It’s too long to post as a tweet so here’s a screenshot of it.

TLDR: I’m not dead and will eventually upload again, when I’m ready.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Little bit of a life update: My drinking has gotten so out of control that I had to go to the emergency room again yesterday. I got some bad news there. Turns out i've got pancreatitis. The frequent vomiting sucks but the pain is indescribable and nothing seems to make it stop.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

I just saw a spider crawl into my backpack. My wallet is in there. I’m going to die trying to get that wallet.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Fork update: I’m a synth now

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

When I moved into this apartment almost 2 years ago I had 8 forks. Today I have no forks. What the hell happened to all my forks

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

I’m pleased to say that today I ascended from Gamer to Hero. I have successfully reunited a father with the son he never wanted. Remember this day because once I inevitably undo the lid on that jar it’ll be like the Hell scenes in Event Horizon but with cheese.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

I'm sorry you had to find out this way

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Kirby Air Ride 2 not getting announced is proof there is no God

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

This has to be the worst idea for anything anyone has ever had

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

This is the best day of my life

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

When I moved into this apartment almost 2 years ago I had 8 forks. Today I have no forks. What the hell happened to all my forks

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

I don’t consider myself to be a prepper or conspiracy theorist, but I do keep a bug out bag by my front door in case calamity strikes and I have to flee for my life.

Don’t worry, I didn’t overdo it. I only packed the essentials: 5 Wiis and 5 copies of Wii Sports

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

So I got a container that has a bunch of middle and high school stuff. Found a notebook from 8th grade. Turns out my ego has always been massive. You can’t see it but my jaw is not on the floor.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Go fuck yourself

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

WHICH BITCH IS FINALLY OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AFTER 4 INCREDIBLY LONG DAYS?

it's me, it was a tough question I know

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Nothing better than spending Thanksgiving at the hospital after being forced into arm/leg restraints and put into a fucking diaper against your will.

Im okay all things considered though. They said I blew a .351 BAC and could’ve gone into a coma or even died. So that’s fun.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Certain things always seem impossible until they happen, which is why I made a silenced pipe shotgun spit unholy fire like it was the angel Gabriel's long lost brother.

Can You Beat Fallout 4 With The Impossible Gun? https://t.co/Qz3All52im via @YouTube

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

The day has come. He is risen. The sequel to the Fork Barbarian, an individual I lovingly named the Nuclear Fork Barbarian, is on sale for 17 more days. He's got a big ass fork in one hand, a mini nuke in the other, and unbridled enthusiasm.
https://t.co/u9tmoR9fjm

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

This video just got both 18+ age restriction and planted with 'Limited Ads'. I already cut out the part about babies' skulls getting punched in and turned into the grand canyon. IDK what else @TeamYouTube wants from me. Maybe a video about a toddler who murders is a no-go today.

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Well well well. Where have you been? Me? I've been a busy little beaver. Emphasis on little, not beaver. Though playing through Fallout 3 as a beaver would be a fun idea if I gave a dam.

Can You Beat Fallout 3 As The Pint Sized Slasher? https://t.co/oqT1IBP6wm via @YouTube

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

Well well well. Where have you been? Me? I've been a busy little beaver. Emphasis on little, not beaver. Though playing through Fallout 3 as a beaver would be a fun idea if I gave a dam.

Can You Beat Fallout 3 As The Pint Sized Slasher? https://t.co/oqT1IBP6wm via @YouTube

[Mitten Squad @MittenSquad]

What if God said: You can have the longest Mitten Squad challenge run video to date.
But Paul said: It's in a 9 year old game that almost nobody has requested a video about.

Can You Beat Tomb Raider With Only A Climbing Axe? https://t.co/wSUJMXDRjN via @YouTube