“They say the Chinese started the Covid epidemic. But really it was me. I’d developed it in my garage and sold it to the highest bidder. Easiest $100 I’ve ever made.”
*Shouting at hot girl over blaring music in the club*
“SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING AFTER THIS PLACE SHUTS DOWN? A FEW OF MY FRIENDS AND I ARE GONNA HEAD OVER TO BRITNEY SPEARS’ DAD’S HOUSE TO SLASH HIS FUCKING TIRES. YOU SHOULD COME”