Fuck growing up. I picked the simplest, boyest outfit so I still pass as young. Mission accomplished, my girl now babies the fuck outta me, which directly leads to me sucking on her delicious tits and milking her dry like the mischievous little shit I am.
Being an older brother means being a professional yap listener for the little ones. Sometimes they rage and I sit there half blocking my ears and sometimes it’s just random nonsense flowing straight into bigger nonsense.
Not even surprised anymore, this is the exact reason we have that golden rule: eyes on the kid at all times, or he’ll do something dumb enough to make you question your life choices.