Muppet Quotes

Your daily dose of Muppet/Sesame/Fraggle quotes, brought to you by your friends at Muppet fan site

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GAUZEY THE HATBOX GHOST: Don't you have anything better to do than boo me?
STATLER: We're ghosts.
WALDORF: Yeah, booing comes with the territory!

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SCOOTER: Alice Cooper? Fifteen seconds to curtain, Mr. Cooper.
ALICE COOPER: Ready whenever you say, Scooter.
SCOOTER: Uh, sir, I think there's something you should know.
COOPER: Yes?
SCOOTER: These monsters aren't ours.
COOPER: I know. They're mine.

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KERMIT: Uh-oh, it must be time for the ghost story. Is anybody else around? Uh, Bean, is that you? I hate this part.

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DOMINIC BADGUY: I'm glad to say the Spanish reviewers disagree with you as well, Walter. They loved us. Five out of five jamon serranos.
WALTER: Whoa, those reviews really came out fast.
PEPE: And "Citizen Kane" only got four jamon serranos.

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BILLY JO DUMPSTER: But very soon the world will be ours, fellow baggies! The garb age! Our lives are no longer a waste of time, 'cause this is the time of waste!
DIGIT: Kermit, the garbage is revolting.
BEAN BUNNY: Don't go for the cheap ones, Kermit.

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FOZZIE BEAR: "How soon can you get film developed around here," he said. And I say to him "Someday, your prints will come." Get it? Prints? Film? That's what we call a Disney joke.
STATLER: No, that's what we call a dismal joke!

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TAMINELLA GRINDERFALL: Sweetums, you old bunnykins. Do you like the froggy?
SWEETUMS: Oh yes! Yes! Bunnykins like frog.
TAMINELLA GRINDERFALL: Why don't you keep him? He could be your pet. Your friend. Your--
SWEETUMS: Breakfast!

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BOY: No matter what you saw on TV, with all those "ughs" and "me want-ums," I'm telling you Indians don't talk like that.
CHILDREN: Oh yeah? Well, how do you know?
BOY: I'm an Indian.

Happy Indigenous Peoples' Day, Muppet fans!

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"Big Bird could be a dinosaur if all dinosaurs were six years old and yellow."

Happy Birthday, Artie Esposito!

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GONZO: Art! Art! Art!
KERMIT: Out! Out! Out!

Attending New York Comic Con? Join us TODAY at 5:15 PM for this year's edition of The Muppet Art Challenge! It's going down in Hall 1E: Community Stage! Be there or be abstract!

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CLIFFORD: Here's something for all you eggheads in the audience.
EGGMAN #1: Egg-cellent!
EGGMAN #2: Oh, there you go with the same old yolks!
EGGMAN #1: Well, you told me to come out of my shell.

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FOZZIE BEAR: Hey, look, guys, I paid a lot of money for this new act and I want to see if it's good, okay?
STATLER: Could it possibly be good?
WALDORF: Could it possibly be worse?

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"Caroll [Spinney] held a workshop/audition with a few of the Sesame Street puppeteers... He shook my hand and said, 'You know, your last name means ‘bird’ in German, this might be the job for you.'"

Happy Birthday, Matt Vogel!

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KERMIT: Oh, hi there, Bobo. Listen, is Cindy Crawford here yet?
BOBO: Pretty.
KERMIT: I'll take that as a yes.

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"I think TV is like fire. It's good when it keeps you warm and bad if it burns your house down."

Happy Birthday, Loretta Long!

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KERMIT: Incidentally, I've been looking at this number you're gonna do, and I don't remember ever hearing it before.
CONNIE STEVENS: Yeah, well, when I get done with it, you may never hear it again.

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POPS: Well, looks like steering wheel soufflé for dinner.
JANICE: Again?

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"Puppetry is like trying to make my hand do what I would do with my own body. It’s still acting and an art form. The better an actor you are, the better a puppeteer you are."

Happy Birthday, Fran Brill!

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GONZO: Kermit, it's disaster time. You're gonna have to cancel my wrestling match with Quongo, the wild mountain gorilla.
KERMIT: But why?
GONZO: He just called from his limo. It's stuck in traffic. Sorry!

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SCOOTER: Somebody outside was trying to break the combination lock on your bicycle! But I stopped 'em.
KERMIT: Oh, good. What did you do?
SCOOTER: I told them the combination.