Howard mckillop

Small dick daddy with a big heart and even bigger morals…ladies

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@asda just seen two children engaging in mutual combat after one called the other a cry baby, the girl elbowed the lad so hard he cried, dunno if it was organised by asda or an unsanctioned happy accident but really made my shopping experience better.

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@AldiUK after visiting your store in king st. Lee, i purchased a pair of special buy flip flops (they where pink), Unfortunately daryl who was stock tinned goods at the time stumbled backwards and spilt a jar of bolognaise on to my (now not very special) flip flops #notdaryl

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

Mad at the amount of people who are apologists for prince Andrew, but yet i refer to misty from Pokemon as “a lovely bit of kit”and I’m now banned from me own grandkids communion.

[JACK @jackoefc27]

☕️🐸👍🏻

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@J_Warrington mad you’re not actually from warrington yeno! fancy a scrap with undisputed champion of the wirral? xx

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

just visited @Morrisons new brighton and a old man was rollerskating up and down the isles, he bumped into my daughters pram and she nearly spilled out wouldn’t have been a problem but i was holding a pack of thin pancakes at the time, #shrovetuesday

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

just visiting the Speke @JDGyms, seen 6 fellas having a competition in the sauna to see who could fit the most 10ps in there foreskins, i told staff and they told me the buy-in was £20 WTF #skiingforsmallafricans

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

Was Just wandering past alderhey ozzy and @darrentill2 was volleying footys at windows, he was asked by staff to stop and he told them “fuck off there only fly aways” #loveit

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@30SECVlDEOS Where did that lil asian fella come from?

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@AskDyson bought myself a vacuum pussy and there was no warning not to use with the Dyson Cyclone V10 Absolute Pro Vacuum Cleaner and it ripped my pubes out, blood everywhere, crying the lot. I think a warning should be included in future #notangryjustdisappointed

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@dannylomax7 can’t believe you battered the bus driver on the 78 bus after he wouldn’t let you buy a child’s ticket, disgusting hope you have a shit Christmas. 🎄#bigarmsbutnoheart

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

@BootsUK in the Speke retail trying to buy vitamins and a member of staff kept taking them off me and putting them back on the shelf, and then when i took them the till he wouldn’t scan them instead just made a beep noise and said “Bradley’s the name inconvenience is my game”

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

A child just jumped out on me in the @currys in wilmslow and made me jump, so kneed him in the arm #onekidaday

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

Why does every girls idle animation look like they’ve just nailed a rabona? @GaryJCahill

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

Was just eating a yoghurt, went to lick the lid and just poured it down myself, #MentalHealthAwareness

[Howard mckillop @Mytelesbroke]

#BreakingNews Just seen @B_Fernandes8 in Tesco knock a load of mr Kipling almond slices off the shelf, when asked why he simply said “fuck off you Tesco nonce”
Disgusting