ems

hmu if you have access to an IV of serotonin plz&thx•she/her/hers•Venmo me @EmilyJensrud to help pay for my student loans 🙂

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

I wish my snooze was 9 days long instead of 9 minutes.

[clare @sadderlizards]

hey sorry for being so anxious earlier i had no idea everything would be fine

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Usher’s halftime show reminded me of a kid who couldn’t decide what to do at a talent show so he just did everything he could think of off the top of his head for 15 seconds each.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

I had a dream last night that I was one of the Richmond soccer team’s managers. I brought Dani a tulip and he cried and said ‘tulip is life’. That was it, that was the whole dream. #tedlasso

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

I just watched the last episode of a series not realizing it was the last episode of the series???

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Have you ever cracked your neck with AirPods in?? Sounds absolutely disgusting but also kinda satisfying.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Rough night. Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn broke up AND the Gopher’s lost. #NCAAChampionship

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Really thankful that the people above me can’t hear me singing ‘Fall For You’ with a super congested voice.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

The last crack of thunder was so big not only did my entire house shake and rattle but someone’s car alarm went off?

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Why the h are eye drops $20??? And why can’t contact solution double as eye drops?

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Kid: it makes me sad when you don’t listen to me.
Me: same.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

The scariest part about living alone is the fear of choking or falling and no one being there to help you. Someone get me a life alert or something.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Will life ever be easier? Asking for a friend 🙃

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

A kiddo yanked one of my eyebrow hairs out…
Me: Ouch! Why did you do that??
Kiddo: I didn’t think it was connected to your face.
Me: It was part of my eyebrow…
Kiddo: Well it wasn’t next to the other ones? So I didn’t think it belonged
Me: kk, cool cool cool cool cool cool.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Wowowow I’m mad at myself and at my watch. I worked 12 hours yesterday and was on my feet for 11 of those. And somehow didn’t get all my steps?? I feel asleep early (because I worked 23 hours this weekend?) and I only had 9,810 steps. AND BROKE MY 229 DAY STREAK.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Hour 23: counting money. One dollar bills will be the death of me.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Hour 16ish or something. Stay hydrated and caffeinated.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

Hour 12: Sam’s club run.

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

9 hours in and we’re grooving. I’ve had a hotdog, pulled pork sandwich, two cuties and a Twix 😍

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

@KeithaNickell Bro, @dominos doesn’t upen until 10:30a??????????

[ems @NaturallyEmilyy]

6 hours in and we needed more pizza. Ordered mediums instead of larges 🙃 fire me I guess