Clever Odysseus

“I'm coming home, I'm coming home. Tell the world I'm coming home.”

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

They think I do not know the name of my wife! Ha, this game is easier than defeating the suitors!

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@antinoostheswag @goddessathena99 what's that you said? One hundred and eight accounts of long-coming vengeance? Self inflicted doom?

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@antinoostheswag you know what that stench is? It's the favor of the gods. No wonder you and the other suitors find it so strange and gross.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Antinous starter pack

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@antinoostheswag and like the same beggar that took your life? Say hello to my bros Achillês and Agamemnon in the real of Hadês.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Ah, ignorance is bliss. The poor suitors did not know that the chords of death were made fast about them all.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

In the nature of sportsmanship I wish all the suitors luck with the bow contest—even if death will be the prize, though you know it not.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

I forgot to apologize to Bellarmine. When Poseidon found out I was a Lions fan he empowered the Gig Harbor Tides to destroy us. My bad guys.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Word on the street is those men who woo my wife and devour my wealth will soon bedabble the floor with their own blood and brains. #rattled

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Well, Athena giveth and Athena taketh away. This facelift from her was quite the welcome home present.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Thank gods I barely escaped those sirens. They sounded better than the new Taylor Swift album! Their voices would make Simon Cowell cry.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

RT If Joan Rivers comically insulted you to the point of of tears when you met her in the Underworld like she did to me.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@antinoostheswag I see you didn't need one to find my pantry

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Sleeping Beauty had it easy! I'd much rather be poisoned into sleep than be poisoned into the form of an animal. #Circeproblems

[Calypso @17_calypso]

Selfie Sunday but feeling too lonely to take a selfie...#Iwantodysseusback

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Looks like I'm heading to the Underworld. It ain't all bad though. Word on the street is they throw a pretty mean Day of the Dead party.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@antinoostheswag enjoy it while you can. I haven't heard great things about the wifi in the land of Hades.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

Tweeting is so hard when you're stuck in the sea without Wifi. Can't wait for that beautiful service that awaits me in Ithaca.

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@17_calypso a never ending party isn't necessarily a great one. I'm a family man now, I can't be partying it up like I did back in the 90s

[Clever Odysseus @Neverataloss1]

@17_calypso those parties are dangerous. You get there and then spending eight extra years there