NoMi

In God’s Country moving Steel

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Why would they even test shit on guinea pigs. Bastards look nothing like us

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Hearing Mike Roger’s team is shocked with the loss, even though this is how they came up with every one of their ads

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Meanwhile I’m over here out pizzaing the hut

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Hollywood hasn’t even sniffed herb brooks speech before the whooped those commie bastards and that’s why they are failing

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

They are making drunk driving irresistible at this point

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Turns out the future does have flying cars

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

At this point in my life I can confidently say that I’ve eaten more @TUMSOfficial than raw vegetables

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

@313Hockey Ilitch says tank the team, Mike says “Roger”

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Turns out a side effect of pregnancy through ivf is that it turns your wife’s baby black

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Nobody’s gangster when a wasp flyin around

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Whoever coined “Nobody’s faster than a big man with a chance” has obviously never seen me fuck

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Had a dream I tried to stuff @camskattebo5 at the goal line in the superbowl and woke up with a migraine

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

@braxton_mccoy Should have let them grow another year. Saw a similar 3 year old on the youth hunt in Michigan last year that shot a 130” whitetail with his 06. I guess patience takes time

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

@LTGetsPolitical Brother a Singh is either the worst truck driver you’ve ever seen or one of the best. Most the times it’s the former

[The Villain Formerly Known As Hani 🏴 @VagrantVillain]

Whoever wrote this is incredibly horny but I agree with the premise completely

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Can white folks sign the word? Like when translating? @alsharpton

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Sneaking out farts when the OB tells my wife to push

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

Gooning with the free WiFi at the vet. Patients aren’t the only one with that dog in them

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

A magician, visibly nervous, reaches behind his partners ear. “Is this your clit?” He asks as he reveals his tricks finale. His partner smiles and confirms, as he’s finally done it. The black guy runs out of the room in amazement, and suddenly, David Cuckerfield needs a new name

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

The only surefire way to desag your sack is by activating your prostate

[NoMi @NomiGoFree]

A hand job from one of those people whose super fast at the Rubik’s cube