FlyingSpaghettiMonst

I am the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I am the end answer, the 42, the universe. I created everything, don't believe that old bearded guy.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Other religions want you to fast, but I'd rather you ate spaghetti. What kind of Creator would want you to starve?

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

See, even I can get into the "pumpkin all the things" spirit. Just need pumpkin cheese and pasta noodles now.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Ohio wants to get rid of the scientific process, but neglected to approve lobotomies. This is why politicians never get anything right.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Remember, thanks to our prophet Hershel Greene, #SpaghettiTuesday is actually on Wednesday.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

@cars3sp @TIME well in their defense, I do have "Monster" in my name.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

I nominate @TheTweetOfGod for the pasta challenge. It mainly just consists of eating a bowl of pasta.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

@mikehouse419 if I exist all across the universe, why can't I exist on Twitter? How could I /not/ exist on twitter?

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

@PetRideHalifax @Allisomething @thebeforetime @AbortionPEI I try to push pasta. Delicious, noodlely pasta.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Today is the holy day of "Feast of Breaking the Meatballs", a day when starving eat as much meatballs they can after starving for no reason.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

@TheTweetOfGod I thought the earth just wanted plastic? #Carlin

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

You can't prove that your cup of coffee isn't a cup of noodles.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

@TheTweetOfGod Equal time for all the guys who "just know" imo. How else is anyone suppose to believe in Me?

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Why is there no public support for teaching alchemy? #TeachTheControversy #EqualTime #Noodles

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Remember #Friday is a holiday - you should commemorate it by eating pasta.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Equal time for "Sun orbits Earth" theory. Since 1 in 4 Americans believe it.

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Instead of giving chocolate for valentines day, have you thought of giving meatballs and spaghetti?

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

How do I know you aren't all actually holograms?

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Flappy Bird? You need to be spending equal amounts of time playing Flappy Spaghetti:

[FlyingSpaghettiMonst @NoodlesFSM]

Cthulhu has nothing on me.

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

Our evolutionary lineage diverged from dogs about 95 million years ago. So glad we got back together...