Jake

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

[Jake @NotJakeAtkinson]

@PhillyD Rematch? I’ve had 14 years to prepare. Congratulations!

[ogmaxb @ogm4xb_]

if i die all my boys got permission to say “on my dead homie” and then tell a lie

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Ligma Johnson had it coming 🍆 💦

[Dan White @atdanwhite]

My wife’s coworker Kevin is legit the best dude on the planet. Got us a $400 bottle of wine for our anniversary. (I didn’t like it but I’m not really a wine guy)

[Robert Griffin III @RGIII]

We all deserve a free month of Amazon Prime for watching this game.

[soul nate @MNateShyamalan]

going to the city with my father to see a marching band :) hope he doesn’t say some weird shit

[soul nate @MNateShyamalan]

in 2012, macklemore exploded from out of nowhere to tell us he shops at goodwill and thought he was gay in elementary school, and then he disappeared forever. each of us gets only one shout into the wind

[Crazy Frog Out of Context @CrazyFrogInfo]

Crazy Frog has died.

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

I made an offer
https://t.co/VvreuPMeLu

[Exploratory Data Alex @alexkyllo]

Me 15 years ago: pivot tables!
Me 10 years ago: SQL!
Me 5 years ago: machine learning!
Me a year ago: deep learning!
Me today: pivot tables!

[Jon @jturnerdds]

I’m a dentist and I graduated with 68 other ones. I’ve met even more in 13 years as a dentist. None of us have been asked shit about our opinions on toothpastes.

[Jake @NotJakeAtkinson]

@tm_schuler

[Johnny Mercer @JohnnyMercerUK]

No expert, but the invasion doesn’t seem to be going particularly well.

Ukrainian tractor steals Russian APC today 👇

[olexander scherba🇺🇦 @olex_scherba]

A spirited exchange between a Russian ship & a Georgian maintenance ship.

- You Russian?
- Yes.
- We refuse you refueling.
- Who speaks?
- Assistant captain from Georgia. “Russian ship, go fuck yourself”

- But we run on fumes.
- Ok, then row, fucking invaders!
#RussiaGoHome

[Cheryl Rofer @CherylRofer]

If someone was an epidemiologist yesterday and is suddenly an expert on environmental radiation, you might ask yourself if he's really either of them.

[Memes @PardonMyMeme]

I jumped the gun on the Tom Brady retiring report earlier. I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith, as there's a drive into deep left field by Castellanos and that'll be a home run. And so that'll make it a 4-0 ballgame.