In a relationship?
Falling out of love is normal.
Getting tired of the relationship at some point is completely normal.
Only the intentional & wise lovers come out alive.
The truth is that, not many understand that relationships have phases. It takes intentional people to go through all the phases & choose to stand firm.
There are 3 main phases:
There’s the infatuation phase (the sweetest), the reality phase (the hardest), & the adjustment phase (where you’ve made peace with all their flaws).
Only a few make it through the second phase, and the few who get to the adjustment phase have to keep adjusting & compromising till they leave this earth.
Remember, the partner you met 6 years ago will not stay the same 6 years later.
Learning & compromising are constants.
That’s the only way.
Buying weed from from that weird dude whose house always smelled like cat piss flavored incense... And getting to take few hits out of his bong that was more expensive than his car... Was a core memory that a lot of you will never find in a depensary.
A man doesn’t beg twice.
The first time, he sets his pride aside because he genuinely cares.
He explains himself.
He tries to fix things.
But if that moment is ignored, disrespected, or taken for granted…
something in him dies.
And he becomes a man who takes no shit.
For a relationship to truly work in real life, you have to accept that you and your partner are two different individuals..shaped by different backgrounds, experiences, and ways of seeing the world…coming together to build one future. That alone requires patience, grace, and deep understanding.
You won’t always think alike, feel the same, or see things from the same perspective—and that’s normal. Differences don’t mean something is wrong; if handled well, they become an opportunity for growth.
In reality, you’ll notice a pattern: you meet someone you’re attracted to, but they lack sense. You find someone who has sense, but they can’t communicate. You meet a good communicator, but they struggle with trust. You find someone who trusts you, but they’re nonchalant. Then the one who isn’t nonchalant may not even have a clear future. It starts to feel like something is always missing.
That’s where understanding the 80/20 rule comes in. If your partner is 80% right for you, chasing the missing 20% in someone else will only lead you in circles. Even if it’s 70/30 or 60/40, the principle still stands…there’s no perfect person anywhere. What matters is that the good clearly outweighs the bad.
At the end of the day, it’s not always about who is right or wrong, but how you handle the moments when things don’t align. Do you listen or just react? Do you seek to understand, or are you only trying to be heard? Do you choose communication over ego?
Healthy love isn’t about perfection or agreeing on everything…it’s about respecting each other enough to work through your differences, protect what you have, and keep choosing each other even when it’s not easy. That’s where real love shows up.