Jess

There is no exquisite beauty without some strangeness in the proportion. -E.A.P.

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@AndyBeshearKY Damn, Andy. Get ‘em. 😳

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@zerodarkwokey @joeroganhq Progressive familial intrahepatic cholestasis (PFIC) was discovered in the Amish Byler family and the first medication developed to treat the pruritus caused by PFIC was named Bylvay. PFIC remains prevalent in Amish families due to consanguinious relationships.

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@deloisivete Easy. All of the other kids were back in school after summer break and mom and dad finally had the house to themselves. 🙃

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@em_Lazzy His choice of General Mattis as Sec Def in his first term was a good one… and he ended up hating Trump, so there’s that.

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

“You'll be back, soon, you'll see
You'll remember you belong to me
You'll be back, time will tell
You'll remember that I served you well
Oceans rise, empires fall”

[Rep. Melanie Stansbury @Rep_Stansbury]

Imagine getting in a time machine and going back to 1776 and telling the Founding Fathers that the King would one day be reminding America about the importance of democracy and our checks and balances. That is the timeline we’re living in.

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@robbys_toupee “You wanna see my vagina?” from Myrna and “Ish?? A 50-ish year old man on a motorcycle? Very sad.” from Mrs. Kovalenko have to be my favorite Pitt quotes

[miia @miiagarro]

"all women do is use men" i have never once found a man useful

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@LucifersTweetz Doing the lords work on easter weekend 👌🏼

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@_6signxxx Not to mention that RSV would run through that building like Tomb Raider

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

Finally some positive news.

[The Halfway Post @HalfwayPost]

BREAKING: Two police dogs at two separate airports have reportedly bitten ICE agents today.

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@billspaid28 Did everyone miss that Mateo was clearly seeing Dr. McKay in S1? He even took Harrison skateboarding. That’s why McKay’s ex got hurt trying to skateboard that day. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@emilyikes Realizing that Mateo looks like my ex 🫠

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@klara_sjo Idk why but I read this to the tune of the Golden Girls theme song “Thank you for being a fannnn, traveled six feet down then back up again…🎶”

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

Nine years later and more true than ever 🖤

[Shawn Hatosy @ShawnHatosy]

Our country is falling apart but I'm still wonderful looking with great arm muscles. Sorry I've let you down by not constantly reminding you

[lori @milfgomery]

"i love you"
★☆☆☆☆

“someday we’ll be buried here, side by side six feet under in matching coffins. our lifeless bodies, rotting together, for all eternity”
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@girlsreallyrule Pee Wee German

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@Jimmyking35 “Little buggy” and it’s a $50k+ Can-Am 🫠

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

@Laurens13tv @WSJ This was 100% his best look ever and I will die on that hill 😮‍💨

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

If grown adults say they want to drink raw milk and treat cancer with horse dewormer, just let them. I’m so fucking tired. Just let them do it

[Jess @NotNewGirlJess]

Imagine having the glory of being the fry cook that makes him the meal that gets the job done 🙌🏼

[The Daily Beast @thedailybeast]

The elderly president’s inner circle is concerned about his love for fast food.

https://t.co/P5z4TG6xrX