Jim Crane

Houston Astros Owner. CEO of some other shit I put my name on. I eat ass with a salad fork. Parody Account. #ForTheH

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Alright, let's go win a world series. #ForTheH

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@qu3stionevrthg @PpollingNumbers I’m pro free education, now.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@erich0811 @Chandler_Rome Fuckin doubt it -jc

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Stop texting me DAVID. #chasethefight

[Michael Schwab @michaelschwab13]

“The Houston Astros have told teams that they are wasting their time asking about shortstop Jeremy Peña and first baseman Christian Walker”, per @BNightengale

He says Houston plans to be buyers and are searching for bullpen help and a left-handed hitting outfielder.

[Ed Zitron @edzitron]

This is so good lmfao

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

I like my small bones guy. #chasethefight

[Brian McTaggart @brianmctaggart]

Jose Altuve said when he initially got injured, he thought it could be a five-week ordeal, but he is back in three weeks.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Hahahahaha

-JC

[Shoulda Never Been a Houston Sports Fan @AstrosShoulda]

Marco Rubio, realizing he has to play SS, CF, pitch, manage and GM all in the same season

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

My team had a good week. Let’s see what next week is like. I bet it will be good, with @Kalshi

[FOX Sports: MLB @MLBONFOX]

RT if your team is leading the league in any of these categories after the first week of the season 👀

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

CJ Stroud will be included in the trade for Duran.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@pelon8052321566 @michaelschwab13 Excuse me?

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

If anyone ever questioned why we didn’t keep George Springer or Miles Straw…I am justified.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@michaelschwab13 God I was wasted.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@HarishSuku32411 I told Joe to pitch to Trout because I don’t like the cut of Joe’s jib anymore. My adult son Jared could manage a baseball team better than that and he will.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Alright, let's go win a world series. #ForTheH

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

I hope you like the baseballs. #earnit #fortheh #traintowin

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

What the hell is a grok

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@kanyewest made this for you. #goastros

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

@michaelschwab13 Maybe next year, buddy.

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Just ripped up Alex Bergman’s new contract. What’s up?

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Can’t believe James Click fell for this.
#Relentless

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

Me and Dana Brown smoked crack for about 7 hours today. #relentless

[Jim Crane @NotTheJimCrane]

We’ll get’m tomorrow