Wesley Hollis

I’m a collections assistant at Hutt City Libraries, a volunteer at Landing Press, and an occasional writer/editor. I live in Wellington, New Zealand.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Why did God give us hands with an odd number of fingers on them? Pretty messed up.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Today I have been called Wellesly and Wendy which one should I legally change my name to?

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

I’m going through a list of writing prompts I wrote a while ago and one of them is “‘Light up a smoke and enjoy a tale about yesteryear’ newspaper article.” I am dying to know what the heck I was talking about.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

@loremistress I’m 100% into this idea for the chaos

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Settle an argument I’m having with myself. A piñata full of mini bottles - good idea or bad idea?

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

@loremistress Glass!

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

The circus is in town, and in the duck shooting gallery they’ve put an abacus up as a prize. I’m hoping that I’ll win it - but I wouldn’t count on it.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Apparently the cost of a balloon filled with helium is now higher than the cost of a flat balloon! I blame inflation.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

@dingdongkid Garlic

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

I wish I was a squillionare. I wish I had millions of squirrels.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

I’m thinking of starting a book club. Bring your least favourite book, grab a baton and start whacking.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Just a boy and his digimon, Suckymonmon.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Fun April fools prank idea: empty out a packet of M&Ms, fill it with hundreds and thousands, offer some to a friend, tell them that you accidentally left them in your pocket and they shrank in the wash.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Why did the octopus laugh ten times? Because he had ten tickles.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

@SpotifyCares please help my account has been hacked and my email was changed so I can’t log in or change my password. :(

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

@AskSpotifyStars help! My account has been hacked and my email is no longer connected to the account so I can’t log in and change my password. I’m also having trouble contacting you through the contact form on your website it won’t work

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

What are your thoughts on drinking coffee with a straw

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Manslaughter could land someone in prison, so be careful not to tell any jokes around men.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

Did you hear the ring from the movie The Ring has written a biography? I don’t know much about it but I hear it’s well written.

[Wesley Hollis @NotWesleyHollis]

@TomCoolins If we’re going by scariness by mortality rate, then mosquitos and cassowaries.