Grumpy Old Thesp

Just a grumpy old actor

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Nigel Farage's grasp of geography is akin to Abu Hamza's grasp of doorknobs
#Farage

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

I bought a hot tick bun from Iceland today. It tasted exactly the same as the hot cross buns they are selling.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Happy World Theat... oh fuck it.
#WorldTheatreDay

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Some irritating git is playing music from their phone on the train. I'm tempted to play the Hamilton soundtrack full blast. But then I remembered I'm a grumpy thesp and I don't own the Hamilton sound track...Jesus Christ Superstar it is then.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

My new dressing room pass time is to watch videos of dogs watching tennis balls floating in swimming pools.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

@Parody_PM Inglorious Basterds.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

That's all our panto jobs gone 😁

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Gladiators is on...I'm off to the pub.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Gladiators is on...I'm off to the pub.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

It's good fun to go for a really long wee just after the DSM calls beginners as the sound No2 will be checking the mics.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

It's that time of year where every actor going back on tour explains to all the others just why their Panto was the best. If you are really lucky they will explain and even act out some of the hilarious gags .

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

@ATDazzles Maybe we should do the same and pop around to their work space and perform the entire production of Salad Days in their office space.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

'JUST STOP OIL' people. Stay out of our theatres. Some of us have pubs to get to.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

The theatrical landlady is the fastest creature on earth. They can make it from the digs to the theatre in 10 minutes apparently. It takes the rest of us 25.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Stage crew love the day after press night. They have to scourer the stage and take all the teeth marks out of the set.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

The onstage freeze is wonderful theatrical device. It allows a moment for a character to step forward and move the story along. It's visually pleasing and incredibly effective. Unless you're the one doing it. Then you just feel like a twat.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Can't believe it's been a year...ONE WHOLE YEAR..! TWELVE BLESSED MONTHS..! Since my Facebook timeline was infested with pics of kids in shiny shoes and school uniforms, standing next to a fireplace. I'm off to the pub.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

Have you noticed that resident directors are always overly enthusiastic when they give notes. Yet the person receiving the note always has the look of someone who's finger has gone through the paper.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

I tried for one of those bows tonight where I look exhausted and then give a kind of face to the audience as if to say ' wow that was tough, but I made it' while at the same time looking thankful for the applause. I just ended up looking like a twat.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

What do we call tweets now that twitter is no longer twitter.

[Grumpy Old Thesp @NotWestend1]

I actually found a basin with a mirror above it in a dressing room today. Rare bonus.