illuminaughty

mom said no. :(

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@CMDROpAtLargeCA lol enjoy losing your job cuck. veterans like me hate you. you’re everything wrong with policing in america. i hope you die alone and remorseful.

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

What happened to “any time, any place”?

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@SarahTaylorV you’ll tell everyone i have a sunburn. :(

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

i told my crew i was going to pee, then a minute later asked what shade of red pee needs to be before talking to the flight doc and we almost got to come back early, but i laughed and ruined the bit. :(

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

turns out all you have to do everyday to lose 3% body fat in a week is 3 hours of calisthenics, lifting, cardio, have a 1,000 calorie deficit everyday, and hate yourself. 🙃

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

good morning only to people who deepthroated their toothbrush while bending over to pick up your earbud.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@SarahTaylorV oh, well, at least you didn’t put your father at risk of cardiac arrest for something minor.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@SarahTaylorV the confusion must’ve been palpable. “dad is this mother nature’s glow up or imminent death for all mankind? also, good morning!”

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

i hope i wake up to krampus brutally beating and choking me as he screams how proud he is that i’ve been naughty.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@RodLacroix justtherecipe(.)com. you’re welcome.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@tuanhuynh51088 @GovDunleavy pebble mine can fuck off. spend the money on renewable energy, it’s even more jobs, there’s federal funding available instead of relying on state money, and it’s forward thinking.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

remarkably done.

[Nick Knudsen 🇺🇸 @NickKnudsenUS]

🔥🔥🔥 Wow. This ad cuts clear to the bone.

11 years to the day after Sandy Hook.

Everybody needs to see this.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

my neighbor’s house cleaner was basically in an action movie. their house exploded from a gas leak and she got to cartwheel across time and space at mach three. why does everybody else always get to have fun adventures? :(

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@alaskansunhat we only celebrate krampusnacht.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@jennifermerr wait, it gets worse.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@alaskansunhat christmas music is unbearable! it’s the same ten songs redone every year. meanwhile, halloween only gets monster mash and it’s never redone. make it stop.

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@SarahTaylorV your dad’s the type of lad to pack a week before a trip and arrive at the airport four hours early “just in case.”

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@jennifermerr yay! will it be available as an ebook?

[illuminaughty @OGCatLover]

@StorminNormanAK because then when she and plus the haha what a whirlwind!