This may seem ironic, considering the circumstances, but I abhor violence. I only resort to it at times of extreme necessity, so believe me when I say this is both extreme and necessary.
You just sit tight, enjoy your muffin, and if I hear you say anything other than “please” or “thank you”, I’m gonna drag you into the men’s room and wash your mouth out with soap. And if that doesn’t work, i’ll cut your filthy tongue out with a butter knife.