Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV

I'm 16 years old and I don't need a governess.

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

I had another Thanos sex dream.

[AM2DM by BuzzFeed News @AM2DM]

Now that January is finally coming to a close, how is your 2019 going so far? #AM2DM

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

“We kinda just like go to nice restaurants, talk about Botox, then he goes down on me for 2 hours”

[Harry Hill @veryharryhill]

My official Barbenheimer schedule

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

“Look at them! They’re going to the gay pride - I mean sardines festival” - dad

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

“I listen to you and retain what you say”
“Okay who’s Stassi?”
“Okay I don’t retain 100% of what you say” - @antbru

[ℳári @cakeblanchett_]

TÁRbie!

[Danny Pellegrino @DannyPellegrino]

Succession & The Real Housewives of Miami are the only shows on TV that look rich to me.

[TATIANNA @TATIANNANOW]

@merino52202 WHY DO YOU FOLLOW ME YOU DUMB FUCK?!

[Judd Legum @JuddLegum]

1. @RonDeSantisFL has declared war on drag shows.

He is pushing to shut down venues that host drag shows, claiming they are endangering kids

But the DeSantis admin was just CAUGHT RED HANDED fabricating claims about the shows

Follow along for receipts 🧾

🧵

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

Pokémon is the Fox News of video games.

[The Onion @TheOnion]

If the Joe Rogan fan in your life has borrowed any of your workout equipment, try to get it back before it’s seized as evidence in the suspicious death of their estranged wife. https://t.co/wjJY6dCmpc

[Can You Pet the Dog? @CanYouPetTheDog]

I won't be covering Hogwarts Legacy because I'm not in the business of enriching TERFs. Instead, I've donated the price of the game to @TransLifeline. If you're able, please consider matching what you can
https://t.co/AVf5gu1gCU

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

It’s crazy how much dogs love smelling pee.

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

There are 1000 Marina Summers in Honolulu

[Natalie Wynn @ContraPoints]

Heterosexuals openly admit they have to groom children to perpetuate their lifestyle

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

@hereisbosco I love you

[Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV @OMFGian]

Beyoncé is so good.

[Ben Rosen @ben_rosen]

biden after hearing the mario voice