Major Monogram

In charge of O.W.C.A, or the Organization Without a Cool Acronym. Our agents double as household pets. Still waiting on that promotion to Colonel.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

...It still isn't promotion to "Colonel."

[Dan Povenmire @DanPovenmire]

Wait a minute, there's a new pope and he's named after Monogram?!!!

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

I wasn't down there for -all two and a half months-, Carl. (Carl: Oh, right. He also took an eight-week vacation.)

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

And well, err....I.... (Carl: He was stranded in that ventilator shaft for awhile.)

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Good afternoon, Agents. I'm sure you've all been wondering--or at least curious--where I've been since last December.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

*writes on non-brand name sticky note* "Agents Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder, Blitzen, Rudolph: thank for overtime."

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

...we would check that logical assumption by rolling Carl (@ItsCarlKarl) up in our leftover bubble wrap and send him down the chute.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Just to make sure that, you know... -takes a sip of cocoa- Well, anyway, after we made a logical assumption...

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

The Chimney-vator used to be a chute, and back then we calculated every year how much milk and cookies Santa would eat before he got here.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

The Chimney-vator is a go. We haven't asked Agent H to go down it, but if it can fit Santa, it can fit a small pony.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Merry Christmas, Agents, to you and your host families.

[Planty the Ptd Plant @itsPlanty]

@mmonogram [ Same to you! ... And a Planty New Year !!!! ]

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

*half-salutes @ItsCarlKarl with his new mug and pours more hot cocoa* Merry Christmas, Carl.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Too bad we're not in Australia. I hear it's already Christmas there. -shakes his wristwatch and checks it again- ...Not even seven.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Someone's suggested we promote them to -chuckles- security branch.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Since they're doing us a service--not to mention we've let them inside HQ--we're now obligated to offer evergreens long-term contracts.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Since Agent Planty has been on board, we've changed our Christmas Tree contracts.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

@ItsCarlKarl Carl, I want it to be Christmas already. Go ask @When_Is_Xmas again.

[Major Monogram @OWCA_Monogram]

Now, hold on, Agent Patrice (the Pigeon), no need to get your feathers ruffled. It's just a figure of speech.