Audz Kel

I eat, sleep n breathe, it helps

[Classic Horror Films @HorrorHammer1]

Christopher Lee, Vincent Price & Peter Cushing (1983) whilst filming House of the Long Shadows

[Audz Kel @OdgeyK]

The Kitz and Buffy, Buffys sister, died last September, got these two, so she's not the only cat, Buffy and Snowy were my KiTwinz, Buffy misses her sister, Buffy was 12 in April, the Kitz, Black Girl, Compo Moon Bear and her brother Mr Fluffles are 1 next month #CatsOnX

[𝕐o̴g̴ @Yoda4ever]

That face..🐈🐾😾😼😅

[The British Patriot @TheBritLad]

🚨WOW: Mum breaks down in tears on live radio call

“I have to wait until bailiffs evict me and my 3 children, but if I came to the country illegally I might get £40K… it’s not fair”

Britain is at breaking point.

[A View From Yorkshire @models_by_Russ]

Dear Prime Minister & Home Secretary,

I hope this letter finds you well, fully caffeinated, and in possession of a calculator.

I’m writing with what I believe is a modest, fiscally responsible proposal. I understand the Government is offering up to £40,000 to certain individuals to voluntarily leave the United Kingdom. First of all — bold strategy. Nothing says “strong borders” quite like a cashback scheme.

Now, I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, a fully tax-paying, law-abiding British citizen. I know — awkward. I appreciate this may disqualify me from the premium exit package, but I’m willing to negotiate.

I would like to formally apply for £35,000 to leave.

You see, unlike some applicants, I haven’t broken any laws to get here. I didn’t arrive by dinghy. I didn’t require processing, housing, or legal appeals. I’ve actually been funding the whole operation through PAYE for years — which I believe makes me a loyal shareholder in this enterprise.

Given that you’re prepared to offer £40,000 for someone to depart voluntarily after entering illegally, I feel £35,000 for someone who’s been here legally all along represents excellent value for money. Think of it as a “Buy British, Get One Gone” discount.

For £35,000 I will:
   •   Leave quietly.
   •   Not require a press conference.
   •   Not demand a diversity officer to wave me off.
   •   Even carry my own suitcase to the airport.

I may also tweet a polite thank-you note on departure, praising the efficiency of the scheme.

Frankly, it feels like I’ve misunderstood how incentives work in modern Britain. All these years I thought obeying the law, paying taxes, and contributing to society were the winning strategy. Turns out the real pro-move is to arrive unlawfully and wait for a loyalty bonus.

Who knew?

While British families are juggling rent, energy bills, and the weekly food shop like contestants on a dystopian game show, it’s reassuring to know the Treasury has located a spare £40,000 per head for voluntary goodbyes.

May I ask — is there a points card? Ten years of National Insurance contributions and I get a free exit bonus? If so, I believe I’m overdue.

In the spirit of fairness and fiscal responsibility, I am not even asking for the full £40,000. I’m trimming £5,000 off to help balance the books. That’s the kind of responsible budgeting I was raised on.

If successful, I promise to:
   •   Leave via a scheduled flight (economy is fine).
   •   Not stage a protest on the runway.
   •   And refrain from re-entering on a small boat to see if I qualify twice.

All I ask is equal treatment. If departure is now a funded career pathway, I would very much like to submit my CV.

Yours in hopeful relocation,
A slightly confused taxpayer

[We Assess and Draw Cats 🐾 @WeAssessCats]

He is the owner

[We don't deserve cats 😺 @catsareblessing]

no stopping kitty! 😹😹

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

I just want everyone to look at this Capybara

[Posts Of Cats @PostsOfCats]

So you CAN herd cats!! 😁

[Audz Kel @OdgeyK]

A week since my Baby girl Snowy had to leave and cross the Rainbow Bridge 😔 💔 🐾 🌈 🌉 ❤️ xx

[Posts Of Cats @PostsOfCats]

Cats are always patient with children🤣🥰

[RockNRollNationLive @RnRNationlive]

August 11, 2011
#JaniLane
#WarrantRocks
@warrantrocks

Jani Lane (born John Kennedy Oswald; February 1, 1964 – August 11, 2011) was an American singer and the lead vocalist, frontman, lyricist and main songwriter for the glam metal band Warrant. From Hollywood, California, the band experienced success from 1989 to 1996 with five albums reaching international sales of over 10 million. Lane left Warrant in 2004 and again in 2008 after a brief reunion. Lane also released a solo album, Back Down to One, in 2003, and the album Love the Sin, Hate the Sinner with a new group, Saints of the Underground, in 2008. Lane contributed lead vocals and songwriting to various projects throughout his career.

On August 11, 2011, the Los Angeles Police Department and local news stations announced that Lane was found dead of acute alcohol poisoning at a Comfort Inn hotel in Woodland Hills, California at the age of 47.

 Lane was pronounced dead by fire department personnel who responded to a call shortly before 5:30 p.m.

A public memorial concert with performances by Great White, Quiet Riot, Enuff Z'Nuff, Dario, and L.A. Guns was held on August 29 at the Key Club in Hollywood.

In 2011, a biopic titled Cherry Pie Guy about Lane's life was announced. Radio personality and comedian Jeff Dandurand was said to portray Jani and also direct the film.

 As of 2022, the film was still in development and was expected to start filming in 2023

[No Context Cats @nocontextscats]

CHIPPI CHIPPI CHAPPA CHAPPA

[Posts Of Cats @PostsOfCats]

The installed camera could finally identify the thief

[Posts Of Cats @PostsOfCats]

What would you name him?

[Dog Insight Lab | Love. Learn. Bond. @doginsightlab]

@everythingdogss They just wait.
And wait.
Until waiting starts to feel like the end.

They don’t understand why no one chooses them.

But for the one who walks in and says yes, they give everything.
Love. Loyalty. Life.

Don’t shop. Don’t scroll past.
Adopt, and become someone’s entire world.