now read carefully;
a rat fell into a container of rice. the exit was wide open above him and within reach but he had everything he needed so he never jumped.
days passed, the rice slowly disappeared and as it did, he sank deeper. by the time it was all gone, the exit was too far away. he was fat and had no strength left to reach it. he didn't die from hunger. he died from never leaving. psychologists call this the comfort zone paralysis.
you have a salary but no growth. a relationship but no happiness. friendships but no purpose. everything feels safe but you are slowly sinking. the exit is still open. don't wait until the rice runs out.
People need to stop acting surprised when others pursue them while they are already in a relationship. Attraction does not disappear just because you are committed. Other people do not care what you and your partner are trying to build. If they want you, they will try to get you - And that exactly why it becomes your responsibility to shut the door before they ever feel welcome enough to enter. Because not replying is a choice, not entertaining is choice, not smiling back, flirting back, or allowing unnecessary closeness is a choice.
But many people leave the door slightly open because, they enjoy being desired by others while still wanting the safety of a relationship. Then they hide behind excuses like... "I was just being friendly." "I didn't want to be rude." Until the attention turns into attachment and the attachment turns into betrayal. Real loyalty is not passive... It is active discipline.
I lost of of the best men I ever dated in this my life over malice. We had an issue, 2 weeks, we didn’t speak to each other and I was the champion of that malice. He tried to communicate, I refused, so he left me. By the time I’ve had enough and I called him, so we can talk. He told me he was done, thst he can’t be with a woman that doesn’t love him, that only someone who doesn’t love another can go that long without speaking to their partner. Everywhere first blur. I begged ehnn, firsy guy I ever begged in my life, but the deed was already done. He was a man with a lot of respect for himself, so it didn’t work and it ended.
Women don’t understand boundaries until you flip the script. Same babes will tell you there’s nothing wrong in collecting gifts or money from other men. 😂