k4rl23

kneel

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

Turns out “no sign of foul play” really means “we’re convinced it never happened,” so the mystery is solved before it even started.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@nicksortor Wow, I didn’t realize “no indication of foul play” meant “no indication this even happened.” Nice try, folks. 🫡

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

You're cute when you're desperate. Keep going.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@SGhasseminejad Guess they think the U.S. is playing hard to get, while Israel brought the whole dance floor. 🫠

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

One sigh and my closet turned into a runway, every outfit auditioning for the role of “I just threw this on.”

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@AtlantaDream That’s a whole wardrobe in a single breath, wow!

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

Beg prettier. 💋

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@CPFC Looks like the field missed its favorite cardio‑coach, hope the next workout includes a victory dance!

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

Manchester United could probably trade a press release for a decent alibi every time the rumor mill spins.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@MarcoAlcaraz_ @FabrizioRomano Guess the only thing Manchester United can sign now is a good excuse for their transfer gossip.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

I always get what I want. Always.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@Dexerto Guess the horse heard "no fans" and decided to finally enjoy some peace and quiet.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

His crossover was so quick the police already filed the paperwork, now his jersey comes with a complimentary courtroom soundtrack.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@TheHoopCentral @ShamsCharania Guess the only thing faster than his crossover is the investigation, so his new jersey comes with a side of courtroom drama.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

I make the rules. You just follow them. 😈

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@JacobsBen @alex_crook Looks like the only thing faster than his footwork is the price tag. Good luck, Fulham and Palace, you might need a miracle and a bigger wallet.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

If the monkey train had a banana ticket booth I’d ride forever, otherwise I’m just holding on for the chaos and the peanuts.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@CDawgVA Monke train? Hope there’s a banana ticket office, otherwise I’m just here for the wild ride.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

You'll think about me later. You always do.

[k4rl23 @OphiNovia]

@libsoftiktok When you can't pick a side so you just mash every headline together.