BajaBlastoise

(OLED Model)

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

My dream

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@xoveloure I’m sorry but that kid going ape shit rocking back and forth was hilarious

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@Rothmus Dude got the dog shit knocked out of him haha

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@Goblin_Greeb *unda da sea

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

A short story from my brother:

I sit in the food court at the temple of excess known as the mall. The seat under me groans from the weight of my immense form. The weight of the truths that I alone possess. Reeking of last nights whiskey and the anger of a thousand generations, I eat my chicken nuggets.

I watch the bizarre rituals of the "people" around me. Grabbing their order and thanking the slaves who are shoveling this poison out to them with a plastic smile. A group of young women taking pictures in front of a gaudy fireplace. A man feeding his spawn out of a bag full of detritus labelled food.

"Damn them" I think. "Damn them all to hell"

I eat another nugget.

The shape of my form stands out amongst these... blind things. Like a black spot on in the middle of a storm of sickly-sweet neon colors dancing in a hurricane. The pitiful dregs around me going about their lives as if the foundations of our society aren't crumbling under our feet like the pillars of soddom. I stand perched on my throne like some corpulant demon king, knowing what these creatures refuse to accept.

I sip my lemonade. My fury swells with each passing moment. Its all I can do to not stand up and yell out to these blank faced neanderthals like some mad preacher and bellow "WAKE UP!"

Even if I did it wouldn't matter. These lost shells of humanity would not receive my words with anything more than dumb animal suprise, shielding their children from the truth sayer before them.

I look to the skylight. Black and void of anything but the echoes of the crowd. "Are you there?" I ask to God in my head. "Do you see the horror your creations wollow in?" There is no answer.

I swallow a mouthful of the slop I purchased at the kiosk behind me. I struggle to fight it down. I close my eyes as a new wave of rage engulfs me. A bead of sweat forms on my brow as I do what I can to contain the explosive storm of my inner thoughts. I open my eyes and behold them again.

"Animals." I whisper. "Pigs."

The greatest kindness anyone could offer these people would be to end this dance of madness they call their lives. Send them screaming back to the pit. The deepest cavern of sheol wouldn't be punishment enough for the disrespect their mere existence has wrought upon God's creation.

Another nugget.

As I contemplate the last days of this rotten, misspent society I hear a noise beside me. I look, a crumb falls from my beard, and before me is the offspring of one of these vile revelers. "W-what?" I gasp out

"Is this taken?" His hand lays on the chair next to me. "Of course not" I think. What madman would seek my counsel? Does this child have any grasp of the eldritch truths I contain? If he did would be even be capable of comprehending them? My mind is like the tome of some blind idiot God, lacking voice and lacking mind and lacking eyes with which to see the horror of the world he has created.

"N-no... go ahead" I struggle to say. The small miscreant before me smiles and slides the chair back to his idiot clan he calls a family.

I stand. I begin to make my exit, unable to withstand this backwards display of baccanalian decadence any longer. Like some black mountain forever screaming along the seams of the sky with every rotation of the earth I float through the room silently. Sweat runs down my face. My breathing is strained as if some vice is crushing in on me.

As I pass an attendant at the door he smiles at me like some primate creature displaying his teeth and says "happy holidays!" I gasp as if shot and respond "y-y-you too" almost too quiet to hear. His smile is gone now, having realized just how close to the abyss he came by merely speaking to me. I walk into the cold black of the night and disappear into the icy plain of the parking lot, barely able to contain my mad laughter at this joke of a reality.

I sip my lemonade.

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@nostalgia_ Antediluvian memories, to be sure.

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@Cash_Nicholson I think about this video often 😂

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@catgirlprostate You missed the point of this post. Sorry you’re not whatever gender you want to be

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@khazarAntlers “Mega” is an excuse to alter the best thing that existed - gen 1-3

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@doggygoth Sorry, you’re a dumb dumb

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@DinTheeWriter Best part is that it was a JOKE

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@9mmballpoint Cuck

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@InchOrInfinity We are rooting for you!

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@DanBilzerian You sound like a panicked Jew hater

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@isda1979 Bot account. Why did your kids die?

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@MaxLonged I think you should fuck off

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@Hightv @Pokemon @PokemonGoApp @PokemonGOAppJP @PokemonUnite @POKESTREETZ @Nintendo Dude tries to build this heartwarming story and thinks we believe he didn’t open his pokemon red version as a kid. Either you were like 16 when this released and didn’t care by then or you’re an imposter. Why didn’t you open this?

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@greg16676935420 Otter Pops. My user handle confirms this

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@TsukiIwakura Because he’s a good dad

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

Took some leave off work to chaperone my 3-year-old’s field trip. When I told the teachers and other parents I was taking her home afterward, they looked shocked.
Apparently this is normally “me time” for parents — drop the kids back at school and go relax.
I get it. Parenting is exhausting and we all need breaks. But these years are so short. If you’re already out with your little one, take them home. Skip the errands. Skip the solo coffee run. Just be with them.
You’ll never get this time back. Don’t hand it away. @MrBallen

[BajaBlastoise @OtterPopRed]

@khazarAntlers Don’t speak for us, please 🙏.