Patrick Savali

Plant a Tree for a Cause/
/Mental Health Chauvinist.
/A small boy from a small village who has little to say.
/A citizen who pays taxes religiously.

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

Ginger

Garlic

Hibiscus leaves

Honey

And Lemon.

Doctors Don't want you to discover that.

Thank me later.

[Robert ALAI, HSC @RobertAlai]

The former CDF told President Ruto that Gen Ogola would overthrow him. Sad!

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

@BalogunSonia4 Shoots fired. This is the greatest thing I've read on the internet. NOW becoming that Genuine Guy is even another 30 times harder than Going back to the woman that just left you🤣🤣

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

@BalogunSonia4 Shoots fired. This is the greatest thing I've read on the internet. NOW becoming that Genuine Guy is even another 30 times harder than Going back to the woman that just left you🤣🤣

[Sonia @BalogunSonia4]

A MAN!!!!! will find another you
30 times before you find another him. 🗣️💯

[Olise @OliseHQ]

We will try again next season 💔

[Hon.Kamau Kabogo,HSC ✸ @HonKamauKabogo]

Mr 5 million per hr

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

@onjolo_kenya 🤣🤣🤣Wako Pipeline

[Algoosh @AlgooshPortal]

@Simon_Ingari 11:00 AM is dangerous. You’re basically being judged by someone whose coffee has worn off and lunch hasn’t arrived. 🤣

[Atul Kumar | Personal Finance 🇮🇳 @atul1602]

@Simon_Ingari Either be the first impression or the last memory. Never the middle.

[The Better Less @thebetterless]

@Simon_Ingari Don’t pick 11:00 AM.

It’s late morning, people are already in the middle of their day and thinking about lunch.

Earlier slots feel sharper, later ones feel rushed, pick a time where you’ll have their full attention.

[Simons @Simon_Ingari]

If HR asks you to choose when to be interviwed, don't choose 11:00 AM.

[Peris @Wambuib4sky]

The next one to ditch UDA will be Kimani Wamatangi

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

@ProfKibwana is a hilarious man.
There was a day he posed at a local university eatery joint chewing Chapo Mix and another day Shadowing under a tree after a lecture. This is a perfect example that service is a calling and leaders can survive without displaying oppulance

[JaPrado. @Dr_AustinOmondi]

I remember a few years back my married colleague disagreed with the wife and we went to a family confer to reconcile them. Pal said “Mimi ndio mwenye makosa na sitaki kusamehewa..” The shock on our faces😂

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

@ProfKibwana is a hilarious man.
There was a day he posed at a local university eatery joint chewing Chapo Mix and another day Shadowing under a tree after a lecture. This is a perfect example that service is a calling and leaders can survive without displaying oppulance

[Peris @Wambuib4sky]

Huyu jamaa hukua na comebacks..He's the same person who said kupenda rais Si kazi yetu 😭😂😂

[Kingdom Bank Kenya @KingdomBankKE]

Cyprian Barasa, Kingdom Bank Ongata Rongai Branch Manager, welcomed customers to the 2026 Rongai Branch #MSMEClinic, setting the tone for a day of impactful engagement

[Thirsty Kipsoiwet 🇰🇪 🇳🇱 @Makiadi_]

In major hospitals hapa Kenya, kuna some experienced “smugglers” with many years under their belt and vast connections. Huwa wanaitwa specifically bill ikishinda patient who is admitted and the family is willing to “talk.”

Usually, they meet relatives and well-wishers kwa restaurant just outside but near the vicinity. He first asks for the original bill, then scans it slowly while shaking his head in sadness, occasionally glancing at his “clients” as they sip tea nervously. Then he says, “Hii mkilipa yote, si mtauza shamba zote mkuwe squatters?”

No one responds before the chairman leading the “congregation” says in low tones, “Tulitumwa kwako. Ona venye utatusaidia my brother, unajua hali ya uchumi.”

He takes out his phone and goes straight to the calculator. Usually, from the total bill, the standard payment is one-third. But when he uses his “third eye” and “smells” weak family ties, there’s a small discount huwa mnapewa.

After reaching an agreement, they huddle together with his clients, and he clarifies that the entire operation is based on trust and strictly cash-only. Once the “transfer fees” are finalized, he tells them that the moment they receive his call, waanze kuwasha engine of their Toyota Noah, ready to receive their loved one.

Halafu mnapewa warning, relatives with weak hearts wasishtuke when they see the patient—who had fully recovered—being wheeled into the parking lot in a wheelchair, kama amefunikwa na a blue sheet from miguu all the way to the head.

The smuggler is connected to everyone—from gate watchmen, nurses, doctors, and accountants—in short, everyone eats.

The patient is also briefed: if they see someone enter the ward wearing a cap that has “sealed” everything leaving the eyes only and pushing a wheelchair, afuate venye anaambiwa, na aache maswali mingi.

After going to the hospital together and instructing them to wait for him in the parking lot, he returns a few hours later as promised, wheeling in the patient, who is covered from head to toe.

If the family is heading to North Rift, he even gets into the car na anakaa hapo mbele and escorts them up to Kangemi before returning by matatu.

In his own words, before the relatives thank him profusely, “Hapendi kucheza na kazi yake.”

As he gets out, he reminds them once more, “Mmeona venye tunacheza? Msisahau kuniletea wateja!”

[Ja Loka @_fels1]

It costs Ksh 14.16 to send 200 bob from Equity to Mpesa but only Ksh 2.26 to send 1000 bob from Equity to Standard Chartered bank. Make it make sense.

[Patrick Savali @Pan_Africanis]

@citizentvkenya @KibagendiToni Mimi ndio @KibagendiToni