Payton Lockas

[cнєєкυ⋆｡🪐˚ ⋆ @Okay_Bye___]

Me refusing to sleep because i didn't get enough me time after work

[s @skaterz090]

they hate on me for farting but the biggest stars are full of gas

[c! 🌐 @ch_pter]

sitting at work at the ripe age of 25 thinking about going home and playing black ops 2

[olive pit @livvmeow]

New gaming chair made from a honda odyssey 2nd row captain chair. Fully reclines btw

[Miserable Mets Fan @MiserableMet]

A generational wordsmith I’ll be telling my kids and grandkids about

[dashiel @new_dash_snow]

tapped big man on the shoulder like they work at the power plant together

[Power to the People ☭🕊 @ProudSocialist]

In the U.S. he would become president.

[Eric Koch @EricDKoch]

Is he about to be forced to resign as the prime minister of the UK?

[OptaSTATS @OptaSTATS]

Pete Crow-Armstrong of the @Cubs is one of three players in MLB history to have a month with:

.375+ batting average
.775+ slugging pct
80+ total bases
15+ walks
10+ home runs
5+ stolen bases

The others are Babe Ruth (June 1920, July 1920, May 1930) and Lou Gehrig (June 1930).

[Payton Lockas @PaytonLockas23]

@atioberoi Whatever helps you cope, man. Both are great TE’s and both fit their respective offenses.

[Wost🕷️ @mosthiphop]

This shit went diamond in my car on GTA 5

[Alyssa 🌻 @alyssaleann]

cracking up that the replies are almost exclusively Americans saying that every shower in the whole dang country inexplicably has different controls and all of us do the same humiliation ritual at hotels

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[gwen howerton @kissphoria]

Texas Tech must never be allowed to develop a nuclear weapon

[Cades Attorney 💼👨🏾‍💼 @CadesAttorney]

Fox not dribbling the ball out

[Payton Lockas @PaytonLockas23]

@RichWellington0

[alexjm 🇺🇸 @alexjmingolla]

Europeans online: “stay away from America, it’s horrible!”

@FreddyLA7 discovering a new state:

[Not Jerome Powell @alifarhat79]

Never deleting this app

[Mr PitBull Stories @MrPitbull07]

A Dollar General employee with diabetes started feeling the symptoms of a hypoglycemic episode while working at the cash register.

She grabbed a $1.69 orange juice from the store and drank it to stabilize her blood sugar, then paid for it after the medical emergency passed.
She did pay for it.

But the company fired her anyway, calling it “grazing” because she consumed the item before purchase.

Later, a jury sided with her and awarded her $277,565 total, including $27,565 in back pay and $250,000 in compensatory damages.