@i_am_dimmygee Forgave this one (partially ), though I was still cold and hostile. She swore on her father's grave she has done the right thing and she won't do it again. Barely two weeks in, she was back with him. Dropped her ass. Told her that's her soul mate and she should just go to him.
This message is practical to me personallyโฆ Got a job with Oando PLC in 2011, was doing extremely well and I made sure my savings, my pay slips and my salary was known to my wife as it comes, she at that time had no job, but I made sure every penny I earned was transparently utilized at home. 2018 Oando had a major shake, area offices were shut down and in some instances, staff were laid off, major shares in Oando then were sold to OVH energy and that shake off affected me. I was laid off and for 5 years it was a disaster taking care of the home. But guess what? My wife got a job with a leading NGO and she immediately became the provider for 5 good yearsโฆ No disrespect, No pride, No complain, No Noiseโฆ nobody knew I lost my job only that youโll always see me at home if youโre very observant.
I regained my shield and I have made a vow to spoil this woman till I dieโฆ
Moral lesson:
Make money a tool in your home, whether itโs coming from you or your wifeโฆ
This is what a non-transactional relationship looks like.
1. You go on dates, the man pays for it.
2. She visits him, she pays for her transport.
3. On their special dates, they gift each other whatever they can afford without comparing or competing with each other.
4. She pays for her hair, airtime, rent, etc, and he does the same.
5. If they're cohabiting, she brings and he brings, but he pays for the rent. And the bringing doesn't have to be equal.
6. If they're serious, she continues to look for ways to invest in him, while he continues to look for ways to invest in the future of both of them.
7. If she's in genuine financial needs, he can offer to help as much as possible if he can.
8. Once in a while, he can decide to give her money randomly. Especially when she does something he's proud of.
9. He's not responsible for her siblings or parents' financial needs or wants.
10. Sex is never weaponised or commercialised. It happens because both of are adults and you enjoy pleasing each other sexually.
11. You genuinely care for each other, and would still continue to care for each other, even when sex has not been involved for a while.
12. If the woman "loans" him money, he has to pay back. And if he "loans" her money, she doesn't necessarily have to pay back or pay all.
End.