lasagna

Conductor of the poop train

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Drinking some MLBs

S my C!!!!

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

@himbo_urbanist Truckee

[Kali @Kali_de_Armas]

yeah i'm addicted to porn. por'n a big tall glass of wine! i'm an alcoholic

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

You can tell who was into bionicle growing up by just the way they looked

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

If I crapped beef stew you could consider world hunger solved

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

I want to strangle the inventor of hot honey

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

There’s a storyline in early Pokémon games where a Pokémon known for being an enormous fatass falls asleep on a major road between two cities and devastates the local economies

[Chase Passive Income @chasedownleads]

I took 217 Waymo rides yesterday

Each ride cost $7

I urinated in the backseat of every car

Guess who owns the company that charges $250 to thoroughly clean each car

$243 in pure profit for each ride

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

@TMacPhils Thank you for always stopping the spin Tmac

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Hand up 🙋‍♂️ I was wrong. It came out, I saw it opening nightand it was good. @markiplier You may now enter the penis repair facility.

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

I don't give a fuck about the Iron Lung movie anymore. Been waiting 2+ years to watch it, but I don't care.

What I do want to watch now is Markiplier's penis exploding. He needs to go to the penis explosion chamber immediately to have his penis exploded.

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Buddy at my job is probably Donnie Wahlberg’s biggest fan, talks about him all the time

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

The only time I’m ever sucked out of a movie is watching the characters in casino royale play poker

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

@HawkEmDownChris Yooper DeYean

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

@piersmorgan The big problem here is that Britain couldn't afford it

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

@realDonJunk @975TheFanatic @JonMarksMedia Yes. Not sign a 35 year old catcher for 15 million dollars a year.

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

@realDonJunk @975TheFanatic @JonMarksMedia That depends are you a Phillies fan who wants the team to do well?

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Haven't heard from Jack Harlow in a minute,,, probably gearing up to put that cowboy hat on

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Hey Arnold is the worst show of all time

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Crap is stored in the butt cheeks

[lasagna @PhilLasagna]

Owner of a lonely fart