Philip N. Marx

Lead Anchor and Receptionist at @KayfabeNews.
Trusted source of fair, honest, balanced sports-entertainment journalism.
Shampoo enthusiast.
#UMAGA2020

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Don't let this happen to you.
https://t.co/wfeh1X8TwY

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

This is a devastating blow to sports-entertainment. Reporter Harry Canrana reports live on this breaking story.
https://t.co/ZlU9L0Tw3w

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

This. Is. Journalism.
https://t.co/lUP7pzEZAJ

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Who do YOU think will portray the New Undertaker?
Tune in to Taker Search on the WWE Network:
https://t.co/DoCVuRt4Wa

My money is on @GregoryIron.

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

I will gladly debate Mr. Panki on air!

Perhaps I will finally get him to admit that he wears a toupee! How sad for him.

Surely a business-minded man like @TripleH would want the debate WWE programming. I wonder if he knows Mr. Panki personally.

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

RT/Share if you want to see a live debate between these two titans of journalism-entertainment: Mr. Henry E. Panki and Mr. Philip Marx.

Perhaps with a hair-versus hair stipulation?

@WWE
@TripleH
https://t.co/PqYa4EkqDk

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

That Henry Panki fellow has the second-best head of hair I've ever seen on a wrestling newscaster.

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

We are very flattered.

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Mr. Cornette, this would be the big break I'd need to get my foot in the door as a broadcaster at WWE!

The buzz is that I could be "the next Todd Pettingill."

It would be my honour to have you as a guest on our award-winning* show.

Phil

*In the future

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

Oh, Mr. Cornette, can we not talk about this like gentlemen?
Perhaps on the Kayfabe News YouTube show?
It will be fun, we promise!
https://t.co/hjyWwCZUCP

Who wants to see this meeting of the minds: Jim Cornette and Philip N. Marx?

It can happen. We just have to beLIEve.

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

@nollaigkelly @KayfabeNews Don't be silly. I'm not bald!
I look nothing like whoever you are talking about.
But I bet he has a strong jawline and beautiful voice.
Whoever he is.

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

This would be a meeting of two great minds in the wrestling business.
Like when Timothy Well and Steven Dunn became Well Dunn. Genius.
Let's do this!

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

@TheJimCornette P.S.
@TheJimCornette, you are cordially invited to be a guest on the Kayfabe News Show for a conversation with renowned anchorman Philip N. Marx.

We have broken huge stories with famous guests before! Behold this blockbuster. https://t.co/jT9E7jfG49

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

If Kayfabe News has brought some levity to a bleak 2020.
If you laughed, mission accomplished.
If you'd like to give something back, why not buy me a coffee (or a beer)?

Go here: https://t.co/gHwpv0V3Wf

And Merry Christmas, internet wrestling nerds.

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

I swear, you LITERALLY will NOT BELIEVE what happened last night on Raw! Watch this! https://t.co/huArEt43wX

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Classic episode! What a lovely surprise this was. Thanks WWE!
https://t.co/mTRbE6cLJT

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Last night's Raw revealed what we have all secretly feared: Shawn Michaels might be starting to lose his hair a bit.
That would never happen to me!
Not that there is anything wrong with it.
I just can't relate! Oh this luscious mop of mine! https://t.co/c6oOe3UoHB

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Gregory Irons has accomplished more today than any of us will in our entire lives, despite having the handicapability of cerebral ballsy.

God bless this angel with a broken wing.
https://t.co/gLW1WVMNHQ

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Who should be the Phenom's first opponent in UFC?
https://t.co/zIaDK8zPLs

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Dear @GregoryIron, I said I would follow you on "social media," and now I am fulfilling that promise.

Thank you for inspiring us all by overcoming cereal pantry.
https://t.co/gLW1WVMNHQ

Love you, Gary. Hang in there, baby.

P.N. Marx

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Please. I'm very hungry.

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

Has Kayfabe News brightened some dismal days? Want to help the headlines keep coming? This is our pledge drive. If 10 or more people sign up, we'll give Philip N. Marx his weekly bucket of fish heads. Thank you! https://t.co/pMPSiW15R3

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

EXCLUSIVE news on Undertaker's final match! Well, matches. https://t.co/3nVrKSAD8c #Undertaker

[Kayfabe News @KayfabeNews]

Saudi Arabia to host The GREATEST Greatest Wrestling Match Ever EVER https://t.co/zNp293qs3x

[Philip N. Marx @PhilipNMarx3]

Did I mention that I’m now in the Bullet Club? Damn right. https://t.co/KxupX9c4Lh