Philip Roth

Novelist, Newark native, HUUUUUUUGE fan of The Apprentice.
Satire account.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Sorry I've been away from Twitter for so long, been getting really into Xbox.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Super-pumped for 'Real Steel.' Behind Wolverine, a robot boxing coach was the part Hugh Jackman was born to play.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

I loved 'The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.'

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

In all seriousness, congratulations to Tomas Tranströmer.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Anyone know of any good YouTube tutorials on how to tie a necktie? I'm going to an advanced screening of 'Real Steel' tonight.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Who the fuck is Tomas Transformer?

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

If a character has an accent, write their dialogue EXACTLY how it sounds. It assures authenticity.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

To this day, I am upset that Kurt Vonnegut was in 'Back to School.' I thought I nailed the audition. (Even though I read for Thornton Melon)

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

To people asking me to write an autobiography: It's called the "About the Author" page, dill weed.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Writing Tip: As I always say, have your characters wear T-Shirts with funny slogans on them. Great way to inject humor into any story.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Of course I'd change it up for a new generation of 'Hulk' fans. Maybe he turns red.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

I've asked repeatedly if they want me to write a Pilot script. I have so many ideas for a Hulk TV show. It would be exciting, fun, and sexy.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Two new 'Hulk' movies in the past 10 years and no new 'Hulk' TV Show. Excuse my vulgarity, but that is total horse shit.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

I glued it to a yard stick to jazz it up (the yardstick, not the lanyard).

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Lanyards are great activities to do on long flights. I made one that was 3 feet while on the plane to the UK to pick up my Man Booker prize.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Sometimes I can just make lanyards for hours. Working on a green-yellow-blue guy right now.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

Do they make tubs of Ben & Jerry's bigger than the standard size? Asking for a friend.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

.@APStyleBook Is it "Arch Delux," "Arche Deluxe," "Arch Deluxe," or "Arche Delux?" I can never remember.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

I wrote 'The Dying Animal' in one sitting after drinking five Rockstar Juiced Guavas.

[Philip Roth @Philip_Roth]

People often ask me how I am able to produce so much writing at such a high rate. Three Words: Rockstar Energy Drink.