Philittups

Did I just fart?

[Philittups @Philittups]

Knicks lose game 3. Conspiracy time!

Spurs colors are black and white.

The refs colors are black and white.

Coincidence? I THINK NOT! #NBAIsScripted

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@concertvids34 Wild!

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🚨🚨🚨 Clay Holmes out with broken leg. His brother, Stone Watson, to take his place.

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Vrabel leaving the pats to go to JP Morgan, per me

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@lids I LIKE FREE HATS

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Mike Williams is retiring.

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BREAKING: Chicken Neck spotted at Citi Field disguised as a hot dog. Security got suspicious when it screamed “NECK OVER MUSTARD” during the 7th inning. 🌭🗣️ #GiveNeckAChance #MetsMayhem

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Breaking: Chicken Neck showed up at Citi Field, farted loud — Mets fans cheered! His “gas-powered” anthem sparked a Mets win streak. #GiveNeckAChance #MetsMagic

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UPDATE: Chicken Neck just held a press conference from a Little Caesars parking lot wearing a Mets jersey made of deli meat. Declared himself MVP. Clucked the anthem. #GiveNeckAChance 🐔🥩🇺🇸

[Philittups @Philittups]

Chicken Neck made bail and is launching the #GiveNeckAChance movement. Says it’s time we ALL give neck—for unity, for peace, for playoff hopes. 🐔✊

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BREAKING: Chicken Neck was arrested at Citi Field after hurling chicken feed at Mr. Met while screaming, “YOU’RE THE REASON BELTRÁN DIDN’T SWING!”
He then flapped into the dugout, and pecked Buck Showalter’s clipboard in protest.
Refused comment. #JusticeForNeck

[Philittups @Philittups]

UPDATE: Chicken Neck has saved the Mets’ season.
•Pooped on the floor in the dugout for dominance.
•Peed on the Phillies logo.
•Gave Nimmo a pregame cluck pep talk.
Since then: 6-game win streak.
He’s not the hero we wanted—he’s the poultry we needed. 🐔💪💩 #ChickenNeck

[Philittups @Philittups]

BREAKING: Sources confirm Chicken Neck has officially sabotaged the Mets’ season.
•Made the bullpen poop their pants.
•Ate Lindor’s sunflower seeds.
•Told Alonso to swing at everything.
The man is batting .000 and vibes -72.
Mets fans, we riot at dawn. 🐔💩⚾️ #LFGM

[Philittups @Philittups]

My friend Sean told me to tweet that McDavid will go to the Rangers. He doesn’t smell good

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Pacers dude tore his Achilles. That sucks. Hope he feels better. Must’ve hurt. He look like he said “ow!” So my guess is yes.

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Sports Fact of the Day: Teams that go on to win game 7 of their respective championship round has a 63% chance of winning.

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🚨🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS Angel Reese lost all of her jewelery. I guess you can say we’re looking for….Reeses Pieces?

Fart on my face.

[Philittups @Philittups]

Devers traded to the Giants by the Red Sox. Some would say that was a….Giant mistake? I hate myself.

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@jbecher

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@rawkandrolling love you josh! Did you guys make bulk ethereal cones? If so, how do we get them? We need more love in CT!