Beth 🐝

• Friend of ducks •Tea enthusiast • she/ her•

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Life is short, kiss your friends.

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

In retrospect, ordering a steak immediately after seeing @BonesAndAllFilm was not my smartest decision

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Moving to a new city is always an interesting experience.

Today I navigated my way back to the bus stop solely via Christmas lights.

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

“Your hair is looking fabulous today, it’s giving Piers Morgan!”

A compliment (?) I heard in Nandos today

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

@sianthesiansian Only just on par with peanut butter kitkats

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Hell hath no torture like accidentally touching cold baked bean juice

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Still coming to terms with the fact I got stung by a jellyfish today

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

If you don’t reply to your computer when it makes bing bong noises, i don’t want to be friends with you

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

@sianthesiansian Big pretty head! Space for all the forehead kisses!

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

@doddleoddle i am so so sorry but it had to be done

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Snacks at 3am feel more like midnight snacks than at midnight (?)

[★彡J.M.K.E🗿 @sistersniffany]

They should put jokes on lateral flow tests like on penguin bars

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

They’ve got to stop naming Covid variants like Pokémon, because I seem intent on catching them all 🙃

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Some kid picked up a Bugs Bunny plushie at work today and said “omg it’s Big Chungus!”

I felt eligible for a retirement fund.

[callum @callumpolak]

I have 27 plants and this is my cry for help

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

I just saw two dudes buy sunflower oil from the petrol station and put it in their car I-

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

When I was a kid I always wanted to adopt a penguin from WWF, but I was concerned that my kitchen didn’t have enough space for the ice.

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

Remembering that poor scout leader I had in summer camp 2012 who had to deal with about forty 12 year olds singing the lyrics to “whistle” by flo rida while having no idea what the song actually meant

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

It’s getting to the point where I have a visceral reaction to the words “it’s coming home”

[Beth 🐝 @PittaBeth]

@sianthesiansian Oh no that’s not cute. Mine featured me getting stabbed by a nun with a katana