Political Decoy

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

this ride share service is completely free. the drivers fart in the car the entire time but you can save a ton of money

[Chicken Farmer-San @chicknfarmersan]

yes

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

would it count as attempted murder if you dressed up in a Mr. Peanut costume and chased someone that had a peanut allergy

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

ok the doctor literally prescribed me pictures of women's thongs. How's it supposed to help my gout? I have no clue!

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

No need for any other game

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Sir, we're picking up something on the radar that I've never seen before

That's a big, beautiful butt, private. You wouldn't know what to do with it

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Big storm this weekend. Bad time to trade all my umbrellas for one Pokemon energy card

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

@fr0g_skin

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

So sick of engagement tweets. If you agree post a picture of your favorite bra

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

All units please be advised. There's a woman with beautiful breasts driving on the highway right now and we're going have to clear all traffic so she can go get a coffee in peace

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

@Larissas_Lore This would be the hottest thing to ever happen

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

You think it's funny and sexy that a woman's ass is so big it's knocking stuff off tables as she walks through the restaurant? Well, it's not. It's extremely dangerous

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

The best days on Twitter are when a big event happens or when everyone decides to post Lili Reinhart pictures

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Twitter guys are like "I will be cheering for the Falcons or the Packers tonight. It depends on who the first attractive woman says they're cheering for"

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Point - 90s nostalgia is overblown

Counterpoint - There was a hit song about thongs and The Big Show was in the music video

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Used to always laugh when old guys talked about being attracted to legs but I was wrong. Those things are pretty good

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Marvel Phase 1 - Introduce your favorite characters

Marvel Phase 6 - Introduce new haircuts to your favorite characters

DC Phase 1 - ????

DC Phase ???? - Prestige Television Dramas

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Loud chewers somehow have access to magical all you can eat bags of chips

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Every guy in the bathroom stalls at work is watching the Nathan Fielder documentary trailer at the same time

[Political Decoy @PoliticalDecoys]

Eating carrots so I can see boobs more clearly