Politickled

satire

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Suella Braverman has succeeded in getting more employees of GB News on the plane to Rwanda than deportees

[Politickled @Politickled1]

In Chiswick a pair of cyclists exchange morning greetings

[Politickled @Politickled1]

The trouble with this country is there are sections of the population who insist on having their own schools, who refuse to integrate and whose presence tends to cause friction

[Politickled @Politickled1]

The Met have sacked an officer after he raped 24 women. A spokesman said, "We would have fired him after the 18th but thought it might have been seen as an over-reaction."

[Politickled @Politickled1]

In London a school throws its doors open to adults struggling with arithmetic

[Politickled @Politickled1]

North Korea's ruling party has introduced new rules banning people from speaking at the Cabinet Office if they are found to have criticized government policies in the past. Sorry...that should read Britain, and the Conservative Party

[Politickled @Politickled1]

"I am sickened myself and furious to hear that there have been lockdown parties in Downing Street", said Boris Johnson who attended 6 of them

[Politickled @Politickled1]

You weren't given a free bus pass to swan around on here all day keeping warm. Make sure you're off at the next stop

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Betting on which company gets the Rwanda transportation contract:

2/1 Serco
2/1 G4S
3/1 Capita
7/2 Deloitte
4/1 Shapps Transport Solutions
5/1 Patel Haulage
5/1 Gove Logistics
7/1 Grayling Associates
8/1 Rees Mogg & Sons
10/1 Raab Road Haulage

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Disaster looms as temporary staff taken on during #TubeStrike

[Politickled @Politickled1]

if you work really really hard there's nothing to stop any of you becoming a deliveroo rider

[Politickled @Politickled1]

tory party establishes secret VIP lane for russian donors who want to avoid sanctions

[Politickled @Politickled1]

At an event in London a worried guest seeks advice from an expert on what to do when faced with a sex scandal

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Britain's 3rd biggest energy supplier Ovo Energy has emailed customers advising them to cuddle their pets to stay warm and save on heating bills.
In response experts have confirmed the best solution would be for Ovo to cut their prices

[Politickled @Politickled1]

They're saying Liz Truss may be the next British prime minister

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Table of most dense substances in the universe in ascending order:

Lead
Uranium
Gold
Platinum
Osmium
Iridium
White dwarf star
Neutron star
Nadine Dorries

[Politickled @Politickled1]

tory conference visited by midwich cuckoos

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Tory party conference reaches crescendo of excitement
#cpc2021

[Politickled @Politickled1]

Patel launches new scheme to detect foreigners

[Politickled @Politickled1]

rare to see honesty in politics