Pornish Casty

Quit your job

[CuddlySalmon @nptacek]

the irony

[Books Behind Borders @MHTruthUltra]

Anyone have any idea what happened to that Venezuelan president we kidnapped 7 months ago?

[angie @teaxtarot]

OCD feels like you constantly forgot something and also you’re going to be arrested because of it

[Hayward @JH_Investments]

The UK’s 40% tax rate was meant for the wealthy.

Now nearly 1 in 5 taxpayers pay it. In the 1990s it was closer to 1 in 30.

At what point does a “tax on the rich” become a tax on people with a good salary rather than real wealth?

[hersch @tittyrespecter]

dating apps disturb the ecosystem and the natural order of who you are and are not supposed to meet

[Ace @Wedgie_Nerd11]

I live in constant fear that I'm going to accidently hit share and send my firends and family some heinous kink shit on accident

[J.K. Rowling @jk_rowling]

If you believe free speech is for you but not your political opponents, you're illiberal.

If no contrary evidence could change your beliefs, you're a fundamentalist.

If you believe the state should punish those with contrary views, you're a totalitarian.

If you believe political opponents should be punished with violence or death, you're a terrorist.

[_s.a.m.e.m.e.m.e_ @st_louis_stan]

FTMs always be making faces like this where it's like a Dreamworks Animation interpretation of a confident male expression

[Louise Jensen Duffy (also Ernest Jensen) @LouiseWeebe]

You’re listening to Sisyphus FM, the home of non-stop rock.

[Sridhar Ramesh @RadishHarmers]

It's called Little Italy because of how little Italy is there.

[Dan Chandler @DixieDan87]

How it feels wearing a hat, sunglasses, and AirPods at the same time.

[Tekee @Tekeee]

office jobs are actually so funny because you'll be 27 and your life will be over already

[gel @floodmattered]

No one thinks about me or says anything to me

[allison harvard burke @alliharvard]

An abandoned hornet’s nest found in a shed, fused with the head of a wooden statue.

[Daniella @DaniellaMazzio]

We're so close to inventing TV

[defleppardfan94 @lemonade_grrrl]

whenever someone is nice to me i feel like they're doing it in the way you would be nice to a make a wish kid. is this normal

[Habeas Corpus Linguistics @HabCorpLinguist]

Someone should invent a version of Outlook that can search for emails and find them.

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

i don't want to date. i just want to magically end up in a forever and emotionally-secure relationship with someone cute.