I have stopped engaging Christians in debate over Islam or religion in general for one simple reason;
Why would I study your Bible, learn it as much as I can, and also have extensive knowledge on my book with years of learning and practicing, ONLY to argue with someone who doesn’t even know their bible well, and have zero knowledge about Islam except the vile anti Islamic propaganda social media Islamophobes have pushed out.
It’s irritating, and it’s a fruitless endeavour. The only good that comes out of it is if there are audience like in this case who will watch and learn.
There’s something deeply special about being gifted a Quran. It’s a feeling only the recipient truly understands. You could already have countless copies on your shelf, yet the moment someone hands you another as a gift, your heart still softens the same way.
@analog132@Trader_Uche@SarkinMota_AMF Abuja is probably the safest city in Nigeria. For anyone to attack someone as popular as him, they’d need more than just guns. It’s really not that easy to attack anyone in Abuja, especially in public spaces and central area. And he might even have his security details behind him
Sometimes we just need to think deeper than we do. Did you know that this simple quadratic curve with its tangent is the core logic behind the Newton-Raphson method that we use to solve complex non-linear problems today?
The truth is: If you never struggled with this green graph paper, you would not know how to spot when a simulation is lying to you.
As a Master's student, I took a course on the Rheology of materials. This curve is part of the constitutive model we use to determine what type of property a material has.
Why does your toothpaste stay on the brush instead of running off like water? It is because of yield stress. The slope of these curves is what engineers study to make sure your paste only flows when you apply force to the tube.
This knowledge is a means to an end. You might not see the importance now, but if you study deeper and go higher in the STEM fields they are built for, you will see it.
Wallah invest in your akhira.
Plant a tree, donate Qur'an to a masjid, pay termly fees for a madrasah student, donate to a masjid construction/maintenance, teach some knowledge you know.
And if you've been blessed with a child/ren raise them as you should.
When ladies say things like this, it comes most times from a place of seeing the permissions without seeing the heavy price tag attached to them. Let me help you understand.
The biggest thing you are missing is the difference between a "right" and a "responsibility." When you say men have multiple chances to get it right, you are looking at polygyny like it is a spare tire for a flat marriage.
In reality, Islam does not view a second or third wife as a "redo." If a man is failing with his first wife, he is not given a "chance" to ignore her and try again elsewhere. He is actually given a much heavier load of justice that he has to carry. If he cannot be perfectly fair in his time, his money, and his treatment, the deen tells him to stay with one.
So, while you sees it as a "chance," the scholars see it as a "test." A man who struggles with one marriage and thinks adding another will fix his life is just multiplying his problems and his sins.
Secondly, your idea that women are limited to one husband is ONLY true for concurrent marriage. If we are talking about "getting it right," a woman has every right to leave a bad situation and find someone who meets her standards. She can marry, divorce, and remarry as many times as she needs until she finds peace.
The "multiple chances" belong to her just as much as they belong to the man. The difference is just the timing. A man’s path is wide but very dangerous because of the accountability of justice. A woman’s path is narrower at one time but much safer because she only has one person to focus her rights and duties upon.
Also, the part where you alluded standards to be a "red flag" is where you are confusing culture with the deen. Our tradition is very clear that a woman should have the highest standards.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) told us that if someone comes to you with good religion and character, then marry him. That is a standard. If a woman is being called "too much" for wanting a man who respects her and fears Allah, that is a problem with the people around her, not the religion itself.
In fact, a woman’s standards are her protection. If she settles for less than what she deserves, she is the one who suffers.
Then you said, it is a "man's world,”. Ummulkhairi, you are only looking at the outward permissions. You are failing to see the internal weight. A man in a polygynous marriage has to stand before Allah and account for every minute and every penny he spent between those wives.
If he leaned toward one and neglected the other, he comes to the Day of Judgement with half of his body drooping. Is that a chance to you? That is not a "chance." That is a terrifying level of accountability.
What you missed is that the deen gives men more "space" but it also gives them the most "weight." A woman's world in Islam is designed for protection and focused care, while a man's world is built on labor and strict justice.
I hope this helps you understand.
Allah knows best.