Jo Axelson

i derp.

[Jo Axelson @presssecretary]

#ProjectRunway season begins! Goooooooo #teambuffi! She's the badass this season. Love love love.

[Thunder Buddy Ted @WhatTedSaid]

This seat is either for me or Peter Dinklage. I'll wait 5 minutes in honor of Tyrian Lannister.

[Navy Experience @navyexperience]

NEW: Second Fire Breaks Out at Shipyard Near USS Miami - http://t.co/X36LoTBX http://t.co/d3oxI5kH #navy

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Herman Cain Endorses Who Gives A Fuck http://t.co/hLVgkstx

[MythBusters @MythBusters]

RT @donttrythis: Little known fact: Today is the 10th anniversary of the first day of filming Mythbusters.

[Jo Axelson @presssecretary]

Three more days until I get to see my hubby! Just over a week until I see the #foofighters!

[The Daily Show @TheDailyShow]

Tonight: We dare to say the "V" word. Viewer discretion is advised, unless your kids love vaginas. #DailyShow

[Texts From Last Night @TFLN]

(973): you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs

[The Oatmeal @Oatmeal]

It's interesting to watch a man with his dick in a hornet's nest try to solve the problem by tossing his balls in as well.

[The Associated Press @AP]

Mysterious distress call spurs Coast Guard search off NJ coast, but crews find no problems. http://t.co/SFP9FLxg
-MM

[Robert Irvine @RobertIrvine]

Enjoyed the movie the Avengers. Now home and having a spot of tea before bed . Nite nite to all my twitter world followers and friends

[Jo Axelson @presssecretary]

Linky just needs to go home. She adds nothing to her team. Can she form a complete sentence? #Star

[Russell T. Dalek @DalekRusty]

DALEKS do not write POETRY. This is CHIEFLY due to the FACT that there are FEW WORDS that RHYME with PLUNGER.

[Florida Today @Florida_Today]

Photos: Nuclear attack submarine USS #Mississippi docks in #Brevard. http://t.co/dTTt2jQa

[The Associated Press @AP]

Southern Baptist membership decreased by .98 percent to just under 16M in 2011, 5th straight year of decline: http://t.co/ou6x0R7D -RAS

[The Associated Press @AP]

AP VIDEO: Chicago Aquarium's baby Pacific white-sided dolphin calf makes debut: http://t.co/cNf1O2nf -AB

[WIRED @WIRED]

Maus Creator Art Spiegelman Joins Occupy Comics' Growing Chorus http://t.co/06r4VkbC

[Westeros PR @WesterosPR]

What is dead may never die, but rises again, harder and stronger. – Aeron Damphair

[The Associated Press @AP]

BREAKING: North Dakota residents vote to let university scrap Fighting Sioux nickname, avoid sanctions.

[Mahatma Gandhi @MahatmaGandhiii]

If your job as a journalist is to sell war and hate, then you are guilty.