Seen texting at a Texas high school graduation:
“Holy hell nothing but Mexicans at this graduation lmao”
The cherry on top: every single name announced in the background is hispanic
god damn it.... son of a bitch... I just realized that Blueys mom works in airport security... and Blueys dad is an archaeologist.... Bluey's mom's job is sniffing, and Bluey's dad's job is digging up bones.... because they're fucking dogs.....
Thinking about the time my uber driver got cut off and yelled “COCKSUCKER!!!” then immediately looked at me in the rear view mirror and blurted out “not that there’s anything wrong with sucking cock!”
if he brings out the child in you, you're dating a man. if he brings out the mother in you, you're dating a boy. if he brings out the inner man in you, you're dating a loser
At the 2011 Emmy Awards, Amy Poehler convinced her fellow nominees to join her onstage and pretend they were in a beauty pageant when their names were called