Howdy folks. Just when you thought 2020 couldn't get any worse, my first novel is now available for #preorder ! Hope you like multi-genre, absurdist dark humour - it's what's for dinner! #WritingCommunity#indieauthor
UK: https://t.co/ApxLONGmNS
US: https://t.co/U50SfO6D7p
I've at last buckled to the various pressures of the 21st Century and acquired a phone. I don't like it. The only use I've found for it so far is the ability to easily update my profile pictures for the first time in 7 years. Look at that grey hair. The potent sex badger is BACK.
"Maskerade" might not be a top-tier Discworld book (though I've always liked it), but it's worth the word count for the Granny and Death in the cowshed scene alone.
I refuse to be impressed by the advances in robotic technologies until some firm develops one with long, articulated rod arms with big white gloves on the end.
You can only begin to imagine the overwhelming disappointment and the sound of falling crests if it was ever definitively, categorically, beyond a shadow of a doubt proven who Jack the Ripper was.
Walking home on Christmas Eve as a fat man with full beard and having worn the red woollens I shouldn't be surprised about the drunk who leant out of his car window to call me Santa Claus. He seemed to think it was a great insult, but I take it in good humour. I am become myth.
I spent the evening playing Spyro the Dragon with my nephew, and after he was put to bed I carried on playing Spyro the Dragon until the proper grownups returned. That giggling, blue robed, dragon egg stealing freak-fuck pisses me off just as much now as he did in the 90's.
If the aliens show up (in force no less) it's guaranteed that there'll be at least one poor goon who becomes aware of this existential about-turn because he's scrolling while having a shit.
Here's to you, future dude.
There's a track on "Sacred Spirit" (I forget which, not heard it since my dad played it ad absurdum in the late 90's) where the chant matches exactly the beat of the "Scrooge" song from Muppet Christmas Carol. That was my first waking thought today, and I can't stop thinking it.
I haven't made a video project for a very, very long time. But now I have an idea for one. It is INCREDIBLY stupid, and would only appeal to about 6 people, but I keep thinking about it, and now I think I'll have to do it. So stupid. So, so stupid.