Bingus

CNN's worst nightmare

[Milk Ape 🦍 @milk__ape]

one time ape watch giant boulder completely flatten monkey at base of cliff side. No blood no sound instant death

[Devon Eriksen @Devon_Eriksen_]

The Mailbox Test, like the breakfast test, is an excellent way to tell who you can allow to wield power in your society.

Goes like this:

If someone is hurt trying to destroy someone else's stuff in order to take pleasure from their pain, do you sympathize with...

The aggressor because he got hurt?

Or with the guy who owns the stuff, because he wasn't the aggressor?

You can have people in your society who fail the Mailbox Test. That's okay... they can work at hospices, or shelters for orphaned kittens, or something.

But you cannot allow them to vote, or otherwise wield political power. Because if you do, they will open the gates of the city to the enemy.

I am personally tired of everyone pretending that people who enjoy ruining things for random strangers are just kewt smol beans who are only aggressive because of all the complex socioeconomic factors and lack of resources.

They knew someone would be hurt by what they did. They knew that someone had done literally nothing harmful to them. And those two ideas, in combination made them feel pleasure. And they went and did it.

That is the sign of a rotten soul.

Defending ourselves and our property is not just a right, it's a moral obligation. Otherwise, we just kick the can down the road for someone else to deal with, someone who may not be able to defend herself.

I don't care if a vandal breaks his arms trying to destroy my stuff. Because I value my stuff more than a vandal's arms. And the fact that he tried to destroy somebody else's stuff shows that he, too, values his arms less than the opportunity to hurt somebody.

We cannot allow such people inside the city, and we cannot give the keys to those who would open the gates for them.

[Norm Macdonald Joke of the Day @NormSNLJokes]

Well, the White House is an empty nest this week, following Chelsea Clinton's departure to begin studies at Stanford University.

A wistful President Clinton says that while it's difficult to see his daughter grow up, at least now he'll feel less guilty about hitting on her friends.

[doomer @uncledoomer]

“marine, whats that button on your armor?”

“it says 'plan truster' sir”

“and what have you got written on your helmet?”

"’born to panic’, sir.”

“‘born to panic’ and 'plan truster'? is that some kind of joke?”

“i was trying to say something about the duality of plans, sir”

[santos-inistas @JDabknee]

this looks like a composite image of everyone I ever sold Mountain Dew to when I worked at a gas station

[Total 1shot Enslavement @fleshsimulator]

Did he finally learn that eating people’s eyeballs is bad

[Total 1shot Enslavement @fleshsimulator]

I got some really bad news for you about biker gangs

[Doc Strangelove @DocStrangelove2]

Peggy Flanagan:

[Bingus @PunishedHotdog]

@centristpeater Looking good Will!!!

[Bingus @PunishedHotdog]

@TMZ What a king. I'm gonna do that too later today 🫡

[Legal Phil @Legal_Fil]

Driving four hours to stand outside a Mexican restaurant because *you assume it must be chalk full of illegals* is so comically racist and insane that I can’t stop laughing.

[9mmSMG @9mmsmg]

"Iran is rebelling against its current oppressive regime. The people will be free!"

"It's all Mossad. the people of Iran love the current government, and no one wants it to fail."

"No, they hate it."

"They all love it. Iran is thriving, and everyone loves it. Here, look at this photo of a smiling person in Iran."

"Do you even know where Iran is?"

"No. Do you?"

"No."

[Dan Saltman @dancantstream]

Tap the post

[Click Thoughts @ClickThinks]

Merry Clickmas to you and yours

[Brendan Karet @bad_takes]

the new driving home at midnight experience